08/28/2026
If your dog had a job, what would it be?
Give me the job title in the comments, because after twenty four years I have met some very committed professionals.
Head of security. Doorbell quality control. Crumb inspector. I worked with a beagle once who was plainly in law enforcement and treated every visitor as a person of interest.
Here is the part that is not a joke. Almost every breed we have was developed to do a specific job. Herd something, retrieve something, guard something, follow a scent for miles. That wiring is still in there, and it does not switch off because the dog now lives in a condo with a small yard.
A lot of what gets called a behavior problem is really an employment problem. The dog has drive and no outlet, so they invent their own job. Rearranging the trash. Barking at every car. Herding the kids around the living room. Redecorating the couch cushions.
The fix is usually not more exercise. It is more purpose. Scent games where you hide treats and let them find them. Puzzle feeders instead of a bowl. Five minutes of training reps before dinner. Let them carry something on the walk. Ten focused minutes of using their brain will tire a dog out more than an hour of aimless wandering.
Give a dog a job and a surprising number of problems just quietly go away.
So what is your dog's official job title? I want to hear these.
- Joe
