05/10/2026
Monday Motivation from Barbra Schulte.
Today, I have an article for you. It's about something that's so easy to understand, but challenging to do.
It's about setting things up for success and then letting go to allow the process to create the results on it's own.
Enjoy and as always, please hit reply and leave a comment.
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What Pretty Stops and Deep Connection Have in Common
We all want that pretty stop.
The kind where our horse melts into the ground, stays soft and underneath themselves — and everything feels effortless.
And because we want the stop so badly, what do we do?
We focus on the stop. We anticipate it. We lift our hand. We try to make it happen.
But the irony is that the more we focus on getting the stop, the more we interfere with the process that creates it.
A great stop doesn't begin with our hand. It begins with everything that comes before it.
It begins with the quality and speed of the acceleration.
It begins with our body — our eyes, our breath, our timing, and our ability to soften and drop down into the saddle — all so our horse can feel our request and then balance its body on its own for the stop.
Only then should our hands support that gorgeous stop — the icing on the cake.
That's the process.
When we focus on doing each piece well, and let the horse do its part without interference, the stop happens beautifully on its own.
We Can't Ride the Result
This is true of almost everything we do with a horse.
While we naturally want results, we cannot force the outcome. We can only execute the process.
The outcome is the result of everything that comes before it.
Our Job Is Always the Next Step
As riders, we are continually leading — ideally, through the clarity of our communication.
Our job is to stay immersed in the moment and respond to the needs of the next moment.
Is my horse moving forward freely?
What is happening in my body? Where are my eyes? Am I breathing? Do I need a little more energy — or less?
Is my timing clear? Did I give my horse enough time to feel the cues?
Those are things we can control and work on.
The secret is not to put pressure on ourselves to make the result happen. When we do, we're more likely to rush, tighten, overcue, or stop listening to our horse.
You Can't Force Connection Either
The same principle goes beyond technical skills.
We all yearn for connection with our horses. We want trust. We want them to feel safe with us. We want communication that feels effortless.
But you can't force connection.
You can only build trust through repeated small actions.
You notice and listen. You communicate clearly. You respect boundaries. You repair things when they don't go well. You spend time together.
That's the process of growing a relationship.
And somewhere along the way, through the safety of a trusting relationship, exquisite connection happens on its own.
Dream About the Feel of the Result. Ride the Process.
So dream about what you yearn for. Imagine that great ride. Dreams are an important part of our process. They give us direction.
But whether you want to perfect a technical maneuver, have a great ride in the show pen, or experience a heartfelt connection, resist the tendency to demand it.
Look to the process. Do the pieces as well as you can.
And then let go. Give the result time and room to happen on its own - and experience the magic you were looking for all along.
