09/29/2026
Hello. Panini here.
Apparently I’ve been informed that I am “high maintenance.”
Interesting accusation coming from people who require coffee every morning just to function, but okay.
I’ve spent months at Harmony Dog Training because, historically, I have made what professionals refer to as ✨questionable decisions✨.
I prefer to call this personal growth.
I’ve done the work. I’ve attended school. I’ve received an education worth more than some used cars.
And now I’m accepting applications for my next employee.
QUALIFICATIONS:
✅ Active
✅ Will continue my training
✅ Understands structure
✅ Appreciates an extremely handsome man
✅ Has no other pets
“But Panini, I have a dog!”
Wonderful. Congratulations on your dog.
I do not want it.
“What about my cat?”
Please see previous answer.
“Small children?”
Again, I am trying to run a peaceful organization here.
I am looking for an adult who understands that I’ve worked incredibly hard to become the distinguished gentleman standing before you today.
My hobbies include tug, adventures, car rides, snuggling, and occasionally reminding everyone that despite extensive professional training, I remain Panini.
Respectfully,
Panini
Graduate, Harmony Dog Training
Major: Making Better Decisions
Minor: Being Handsome
Only Child By Choice™
Currently accepting applications for my forever chauffeur
What are you waiting for? Go speak to my humans!