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We're going to have to let Tom go. 😭 He's my favorite boy so I'm going to cremate him, if anyone can help me fund it and...
10/17/2026

We're going to have to let Tom go. 😭

He's my favorite boy so I'm going to cremate him, if anyone can help me fund it and the last of his bill. We definitely went over everything I had and the donations.

It's a selfish request, but my long time colony members I keep with me when they're gone. And Tom is the OG.

If only I had changed vets when they kept saying there wasn't infection in his mouth or when he first couldn't eat.

I'm SO angry and devastated.

PM for direct vet info OR barncatlady on all 💰 apps.

Or just donate towards the other cats in Tom's memory, that's OK too.

Thanks for everyone's help giving him a chance.

We're checking Tom's blood work before we decide on euthanasia or not. Tom is awake and moving, trying to use a litter b...
10/17/2026

We're checking Tom's blood work before we decide on euthanasia or not.

Tom is awake and moving, trying to use a litter box and everything. He's just not improving the way the vets want.

If there's improvement, that's good. If there's no improvement or worsening values, we will let him go.

Please help us cover this cost, whichever way it goes. We're already passed the deposit we made but I've got to know if we're helping or not before deciding anything.

Direct vet donations can be made, PM me.

Or barn cat lady on any 💰 apps.

I've got another hard decision to make. (Edit: we're doing a bit of blood work before deciding! I'm also not requesting ...
10/17/2026

I've got another hard decision to make.

(Edit: we're doing a bit of blood work before deciding! I'm also not requesting advice! Thank you to everyone else!)

If he's not showing more strength by tomorrow, the vet is going to recommend we euthanize.

He's just very weak now. He's showed improvement but...

The only option would be maybe a blood transfusion, if he's more anemic now after the surgery, that could help.

Edit to clarify: yes, he's been anemic and has low protein neither of which was surprising considering the unable to eat thing. This was BEFORE the surgery though, don't know how bad the anemia is after. I'd have to re-check that obviously, before deciding.

Or just buy time before having to let go.

But there's no money to keep trying either.

A blood transfusion is like $700-800 last time I did one at that clinic. And we still need $1400+ on the bill.

Last time he had anemia and major infection issues 4 years ago, he also had giardia that kicked his ass. So parasites need to be checked too.

But he hadn't been starving from being unable to eat then either.

If I was a millionaire, I'd try it even if it's temporary to take him home before he goes.

But unfortunately, I spend all my money on cats so I'm in debt, not rolling in it.

I hate this for my favorite boy who's meowing at me when I see him. 😭

If anyone wants to help, you can PM me for direct vet info OR find barncatlady on all the 💰 apps.

10/16/2026

Edit: Tom seems to be declining today now. I might really have to say goodbye. 😭

***

Tom is improving!! And he's costing a whack to keep hospitalized, so please help!

(Keep reading for full update and recap of the story!)

Direct vet us available, just PM me for info. Or all apps as barncatlady.

We owe $1400ish as of this morning.

This video is NOT what he looks like now. This was the beginning of the decline and I wasn't really considering video as I worried about having to euthanize or pull money out of my ass to try to save him.

Or even if I should.

Meaning he looks worse now, even as he's improving. I'll have to get a video soon now that he doesn't look dead.

UPDATE: Tom attempted a meow at me last night and tried standing! His congestion is DEFINITELY better meaning we have antibiotics working! He's apparently pretty sensitive to gabapentin and it knocks him out so the doctor skipped a dose to see how he is.

We are NOT out of the woods. We now got to hope his mouth starts healing and respond to the antibiotics too. And pray he stays well after he's all better.

BUT it means for now, he'll probably get to come home soon!

FULL STORY in condensed form: Tom is a former feral ex-tomcat who bonded to me years ago and moved into my barn. Despite being diagnosed as FIV+, he's been extremely healthy outside of a couple of scares. He was diagnosed with stomatitis and was on steroids awhile we gathered the money to remove his remaining teeth. He got his teeth extracted a month or two ago and everything was fine for two weeks before he started having pain again and the bottom left part of his jaw wasn't healing from the surgery. After some battling with the vet, Tom continued to decline and being unable to eat at all. I took him to another vet on Saturday to help. He was in REALLY bad shape and now sick, malnourished and dehydrated. Vets were not optimistic. He's got a temporary feeding tube, stronger antibiotics, pain meds, and his mouth stitched up again. Now we cross our fingers.

Read previous couple posts for more details!

10/14/2026

Updates and Answers to Some Questions:

Update First: Tom is swelling some after the procedure so we increased pain meds. He's starting to swat at the staff. Tom is not always the easiest patient, as a feral cat that tamed to just me, so it might just be gaining strength now; it might be discomfort; it might be both. I'm going in again to visit tonight.

Yes, you can chip in, it's desperately needed. PM me for direct vet info or look for barncatlady on all $$$ apps.

1. This is NOT stomatitis. Please stop giving stomatitis recommendations. Tom was eating when he had stomatitis. This is a combination of a surgical complication and vet issues. I switched vets for now.

2. I am not 'giving up' without fighting nor am I going to keep him alive at all costs. There IS a middle ground, guys. My goal is not keeping him alive at all costs. I'm trying to give him a chance to recover from starvation long enough to get his body working again. He wasn't sick before the surgery complication. He's also the strongest cat I know. But I will say goodbye if he's suffering without hope of recovery. But this IS a hail mary play. We've just got to hope he improves.

(I'll make a new post soon, when I get time.)

10/13/2026

I have to make a really tough decision about Tom and I need a bit more help. 🙏

We either have to euthanize or insert a temporary feeding tube and stitch up his mouth again. That'll be about $600-800 more.

I know, it seems insane for "just a barn cat". But he's been with me for years and he's everything to me. He's the whole reason *I* keep fighting for all the cats dumped here every time I want to give up.

With this whole debacle, I'm uncertain I trust it was stitched right to begin with. 😭

That's literally the only two options we have now. He wouldn't eat again today and his blood sugar dropped low enough he's definitely in danger.

There's also no guarantee they can fix the issue in his mouth and he won't know unless they try.

The vet isn't worried about infection being an issue or even the stomatitis. Apparently, it's the lack of nutrition and the tissue in his mouth healing too slowly with the steroids making this worse.

And he admitted the feeding tube should have been considered and offered earlier. Like days or longer earlier.

The vet requested I come see Tom again and decide. Very carefully not pushing me in either direction as he's been listening to me crash out over decisions all day and my regrets and knows I'm considering Tom and QOL.

I took a friend with me to visit Tom.

Tom is still fighting and meowed, got frustrated and fought to get on my lap, and purred.

I already have so many regrets over not getting a second opinion earlier and trusting that I'd be called if Tom wasn't eating or something!

I am getting a temporary feeding tube and having his mouth repaired by this new vet. Tom can come home and be medicated with a feeding tube. My friend agreed that I should try because I'd always wonder "what if" and tried to make me feel better by pointing out that no one would expect a vet to just let a cat deteriorate and not do anything or inform me.

It might work. It might not. But it'll buy time to let him heal while NOT starving and keep him comfortable while we hope it works.

Or we'll lose him and I'll know nothing more could be done.

Please, if you can help, they accept direct vet payments (PM me) or check out my linktree for options.

If I personally pay any more, I won't eat for 2 weeks and I'll have to beg for cat food.

I'm just very lucky the fix isn't $15k or something crazy and it's POSSIBLE if a couple people chip in with me.

I'll post begging for help again tomorrow morning or update if I hear anything about the feeding tube tonight.

I visited Tom at the hospital last night. He looks better already.I don't usually do that because I feel like it makes t...
10/12/2026

I visited Tom at the hospital last night. He looks better already.

I don't usually do that because I feel like it makes their stress worse to see me and get them excited they're going home, then leaving them again, over and over again.

But Tom was SO bad when I picked him up from my vet clinic and brought him there (and hasn't been home in WAY too long), I wanted him to realize I wasn't leaving him and he IS coming home.

I also gave him a pep talk about how he went from pink blood and such terrible blood work when he was diagnosed with FIV, they immediately assumed it was end stage and recommended euthanasia.

I decided to try stronger antibiotics.

He recovered and stayed healthy for years with no other issues. We got him a dental to keep him healthy once it became evident he wasn't getting sick again.

He's defied vet expectations for years!

He's the strongest cat I know.

And he is eating at the vet and tried to attack chicken pieces. He's NOT failing.

But not eating is terrible on healing too!

And if he was ANY other cat, we would have tried different antibiotics weeks ago. Sometimes an antibiotic just doesn't work well, especially Convenia, and we switch! Hell, Clauvamox was still working for Tom before the dental.

But Tom's FIV makes vets always jump to FIV causes, even the one time he had a minor head injury and bloody nose! And they just don't want to even try because "he's going to die anyway".

It makes people assume the worst.

When vet medicine doesn't even know that much about the condition anyway!

Yes, he is, just like any other cat will! And immune compromised doesn't mean he's dying of incurable cancer and I'm just torturing him for a few months more.

It's infection and that CAN be fixed. And if it turns out he's continually getting sick over and over again, I'll re-evaluate then. But I'd like to give him a chance to beat this.

He's a cat with a stubborn URI that my OTHER colony cats have been fighting that antibiotics don't completely knock out and antivirals didn't work for, Tom just gets it worse. And I'm going to bring one in for a respiratory panel to figure out WHY.

And ONE spot in his mouth that's healing but extremely slowly and extreme pain and my vet didn't address any of that and basically just left him to barely eat all week.

I want to have this new vet repair the issue in his mouth, if possible. This incident makes me doubt my vet's attempts at doing so. I'm going to discuss it with them and get an estimate.

But I'll definitely need more help to do that if anyone can chip in.

10/11/2026

There IS some good news. My most feral cat Winter is back, looking much better than when I glimpsed her a week ago. AND letting me pet her again.

I could have sworn she was gone. I had a trail camera and traps and not a SINGLE sign after seeing her with blood on her head for an entire week. VERY abnormal for her. She hangs around untouchable sometimes, but nearby most of the time for like over a year or longer.

I always tell people to not give up and keep looking. But damn, she was bloody after being missing two days and then disappeared again for a week with no sign.

I was just resigning myself to her loss and picking up the useless traps and she showed up a couple hours later, looking fine.

Cats stress me out, man. This is why I had indoor cats my entire life until I moved to Louisiana and found myself surrounded by feral and semi-feral barn cats and cat dumping.

I brought her in to make sure she's okay and she was hiding again. She escaped outside again. *sigh* Looks like maybe a cat scratch on her face or something.

10/10/2026

I just picked up Tom and I am SO upset that I'm taking Tom into the 24 hour vet at 4 today.

I've got $400 left outside my regular vet clinic, but if I hospitalize at the 24 hour vet, it's going to be at least $700.

To whomever donated the whopping amount to my vet: thank you!

Anyone else want to chip in for Tom...

I'll explain later once I'm not so upset.

(This video is old. I REFUSE to video as he is right now.)

Tweety whenever people on the internet want to argue that a cat "doesn't deserve to suffer in a barn".Some cats are just...
10/08/2026

Tweety whenever people on the internet want to argue that a cat "doesn't deserve to suffer in a barn".

Some cats are just not indoor kitty material and they definitely aren't suffering.

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