DarkHorse Dressage

03/09/2026

🧡🤎

You know why it takes like 10 years to train a dressage horse to Grand Prix?
Cause it's f*cking hard, that's why.
Today I rode a big, wobbly, 5-year-old who still thinks the world might end if he has to carry himself properly for more than three strides.
He braced the second I asked for anything resembling dressage, poll tight, hollow back, hind legs trailing like they were on vacation.
I half-halted softly. He popped his head.
I tried again, lighter. He shortened but stayed braced.
Forward came back, tension stayed.
Rinse, repeat.
At one point I caught myself thinking the same old lie: "If I just did this better, he'd get it."
Then I remembered: no.
This isn't about me being bad.
This is about the sport being brutal in the best way.
The brace is normal.
It's not failure. It's not evidence you suck. It's proof the horse is alive, feeling, thinking, reacting. It's proof you're asking for something real. Something that goes against a million years of survival wiring.
We spend years (years...) chipping away at that brace. Teaching a flight animal that carrying himself (and me) won't kill him. That softness is safer than tension. That the rider asking for collection isn't a predator on his back.
Our instincts fight it. We want control, security, quick fixes.
The horse wants to run from pressure, brace against uncertainty, protect the parts of them that feel vulnerable.
So we override all of it. We stop gripping when we want to hold. Stop pushing when we want to force. Stop fixing when we want to correct. We stay soft in the face of resistance. Patient in the face of chaos. Curious instead of frustrated.
And slowly (so f*cking slowly) the brace starts to fade.
Today, after twenty minutes of brace-and-release, brace-and-forward, brace-and-breathe, something shifted.
Not dramatic. Not Grand Prix.
Just one moment where it felt right, relaxed a little over his back, softened and let go for two whole strides.
Then the tension came back.
But those two strides?
That's the long game.
Years of meeting brace with softness until the horse starts to believe that carrying himself isn't scary. Until suppleness isn't something we impose, it's something he offers because he trusts what we ask.
If you're riding a young one right now and feeling like you're getting nowhere, hear this:
You're not failing. You're in the middle of the hardest, most beautiful part.
The brace is normal. The wobbles are normal. The frustration is normal.
Keep showing up soft. Keep asking without demanding. Keep releasing when the answer is "not yet."
Until then? Embrace the brace.
The softness you're building doesn't happen in spite of the resistance. It happens because of it.
Every brace met with patience is a brick in the foundation of trust. Every wobble you don't punish is proof that safety exists here. Every moment you choose release over force, you're teaching them that maybe (just maybe) carrying himself won't kill him.
That's not failure. That's dressage.
And in 12 years, when that horse is floating through Grand Prix like it's nothing, no one will remember the wobbles. But you will. You'll remember every braced step that taught him to trust. Every moment you chose softness over force. Every day you showed up when it would've been easier to quit.
That's why it takes 10 years.
Not because the movements are hard.
Because the trust is.

~Stephen Forbes

The moment we finally get through the brace, pure magic, and it’s what keeps us going and going and going✨

✨Soft answers to brace, release instead of resistance, safety instead of survival mode.✨

Thank you Stephen your word and light are shining 🌟

07/23/2025

We are cheering on Eston Armstrong, one of the coolest guys around.
Always a privilege to work with this outstanding young man!

Eston Armstrong Named 2025 IEA National Sportsmanship Award Winner!

Read:
https://www.rideiea.org/news-article/2025/eston-armstrong-named-2025-iea-national-sportsmanship-award-winner/

Congratulations to all of the top 8 finalists! Such amazing members showing fantastic sportsmanship in and out of the arena.

Approximately 800 IEA riders were eligible for the 2025 National Sportsmanship Award. Among the 35 finalist applicants, the top 8 winners are:

1st PLACE – ESTON ARMSTRONG – $1,000 WINNER
A Senior riding for Culver Academies (Western – Region 5)
Marlow, Oklahoma

2nd PLACE – LILLIAN MUZZY
A Senior riding for Chestnut Hills (Hunt Seat – Zone 10)
Trabuco Canyon, California

3rd PLACE – CHLOE CHOW
A Sophomore riding for Clairvaux (Hunt Seat – Zone 3)
Vienna, Virginia

4th PLACE – PEYTON CARR
A Senior riding for Salado Elite Riders (Hunt Seat – Zone 7) and Breakaway Equestrians (Western – Region 7)
Bertram, Texas

5th PLACE – AMARIAH PANHORST
A Freshman riding for Jentri Equestrian (Hunt Seat – Zone 11)
Morrisville, Pennsylvania

6th PLACE – LAUREN ANDERSON
A Senior riding for Hidden Creek Equestrian (Dressage – Zone 2)
Effort, Pennsylvania

7th PLACE – MARLOWE MILLS-MYODA
A Sophomore riding for Willow Brook Lasalle (Hunt Seat – Zone 1)
Chepachet, Rhode Island

8th PLACE – ALIZABETH ZARISH
A Sophomore riding for Legend HIll Farm (Hunt Seat – Zone 5)
Glenview, Illinois

EQUUS Foundation

05/17/2025

We need to talk.

One of my biggest pet peeves are people who interchangeably use the terms “connection” and “collection,” so I’ve organized for us to have a little sit-down.

Get something to drink and maybe a snack for this one, ok? 🍿

I’m curious if this is a regional thing, because I’ve heard it increasingly in the southern states where I teach- but there seems to be this collective confusion that a horse simply “yielding to pressure” is “collected,” and boo-boo… that’s not what that word means 😅

So with an open mind let’s break this down into baby steps, shall we?
(And I’m citing the national federations here too, so no one gets to say, “oh, she’s a dressage rider- it’s different for us.”)

⸻

STEP 1: CONNECTION

This is step one, and the foundation of riding ANY horse.
(Also, the thing your trainer’s been begging of you for since forever)
ps- this is not collection

• Connection is the contact created from leg to hand, *not hand to face* (For ease of understanding, we will define contact as: the physical connection between a rider’s hands and the horse’s mouth.)
• The horse is seeking the bit and energy flows from behind, through a supple back, into soft and elastic contact.
• Connection feels like a conversation, not a hostage situation. The connection is reliable, but not stagnant (OR PULLING!)

🍎 USEF says:
“Connection is the state in which the rider’s hands receive a consistent, elastic contact from the horse’s mouth via the reins.”

🍏 WDAA says:
“Connection: State at which there is no blockage, break, or slack in the circuit that joins the horse and rider into a single, harmonious, elastic unit. A prerequisite for throughness. The energy generated in the hindquarters by the driving aids must flow through the whole body of the horse and is received in the rider’s hands.”

In “dressage land”, connection is required at the Introductory and Training levels.

This isn’t yet “on the bit” this is your prerequisite.

⸻

STEP 2: ON THE BIT

This is only a result of correct connection.
ps- still not collection, folks

*And yes, it takes time and correct training to consistently achieve “on the bit”, there likely will be moments when the poll is too low, the horse tucks behind the vertical, or the horse engages the underside of their neck like a camel, but the objective is* :

• All the benchmarks of correct connection: energy created from behind, traveling through a lifted and supple back with an engaged core
• Additionally, the poll is the highest point
• The nose is slightly in front of or at the vertical, with an open throat-latch
• The horse is relaxed, supple, and moving forward into the bridle- with a connection that’s still elastic but consistent

🍎 USEF says:
“‘On the bit’ is when the neck is raised and arched [their terminology] according to training, with a steady contact and a supple poll.”

🍏 WDAA says:
“It’s when the horse accepts contact and moves forward with the poll as the highest point and the nose slightly in front of vertical.
The horse is correctly connected from back to front and willingly accepting contact with the bit. In fact, at that time he should accept the rider’s seat, weight, and leg aids as well.”

(STILL not collection)

⸻

STEP 3: COLLECTION

❌ This is *not* a headset.
❌ This is *not* a foal yielding to pressure in a rope halter.
❌ This is *not* a jumper tucking its chin into its chest in a hackamore.

• Collection is an advanced state of balance and engagement, achieved not only through proper connection, but also with a horse that is on the bit…. so we have to achieve and maintain steps 1 & 2 before collection can be properly accomplished (or really even approached)
• The horse lowers the croup, lifts the forehand, and carries more weight via the b***y and hind-legs, while compressing the frame
• The stride becomes shorter, but more animated and energized (IMPULSION!) This is *NOT* a slow, disengaged shuffle with an arched neck (so help me…)
• Collection is developed over time with strength and gymnastic training. It is *earned* through correct efforts and training, not manufactured with rein pressure and a prayer.

🍎 USEF says:
“Collection is achieved by increased engagement of the hindquarters, resulting in a lowering of the croup and lightening of the forehand. This allows the shoulders more freedom, and the horse’s stride becomes shorter but gains animation and height. Collection is not to be confused with ‘headset’ or merely slower or shorter strides. It is achieved through correct training and increased weight-bearing of the horse’s haunches.”

🍏 WDAA says:
“Collection is achieved by increased weight-bearing of the horse’s haunches, thereby lowering the croup and lightening the forehand to allow the shoulders more freedom. The horse’s stride becomes markedly shorter but gains animation and height. At collected jog and lope, the support phase of the hind legs is more pronounced than in the other paces of the gait. Collection is not to be confused with ‘headset,’ nor with slower or shorter strides. Collected paces have relatively shorter steps and more uphill balance, while the frame is shorter and the neck is stretched and arched upward. The horse should reach calmly to contact with the bit with the nose nearly at, but never behind, the vertical. Many riders erroneously shorten the horse’s strides by pulling on the reins, believing that shorter and slower steps equal collection. Collection is not produced by such incorrect aids. Instead, using seat and leg aids, riding the horse briefly into a slightly firmer contact, will cause the horse to round and lower his croup and step in more deeply under himself from behind.”

⸻

Let’s Review in order of operation:
• Connection = Communication
• On the Bit = Acceptance
• Collection = Power, Balance, and Engagement

These terms are *not* interchangeable; it does not matter your discipline or riding objective

One way I really like to phrase it:
• Connection = Conversation
• On the Bit = Agreement
• Collection = Mastery

Our vocabulary matters!
Let’s be better.
For our horses and for our scrutinized sports.
*And for my blood pressure. (Please)*

And yes this last week a “horse trainer” proudly boasted to me that a foal is already “collecting” in the rope halter. ..I still can’t form words because what the actual… 🤯

This isn’t Dressage vs. The World.
This is literally pulled directly from USEF and WDAA- aka the national organizations most of you are competing and operating under. The WDAA even has a pretty exceptional and publicly available glossary, seriously, check that out!

Thank you for coming to my TED talk 😇

**Photos are sourced from **
The Athletic Development of the Dressage Horse - Charles de Kunffy. Photographed is Arthur Kottas-Heldenberg.
Dressage: A Guideline for Riders and Judges - Wolfgang M. Niggli

03/30/2025

It’s not quite over yet—but we are crossing the finish line of March!

The month kicked off with a strong start at a schooling show in Stillwater, OK, with Central Plains Dressage Society, followed by an inspiring continuing education weekend with Joan Darnell and Dallas Dressage Club.
Then? Right back to Stillwater for another CPDS show

And this weekend wrapped it all up with an extraordinary clinic with Kathy Rowse and DDC.

We 👏 are 👏 tired 👏—but also uplifted by the professionalism, dedication, and sportsmanship of students (and volunteers!) across two incredible GMOs.

High Point honors with CPDS? ✅
Being surrounded by true stewards of the sport? Even better.

Here’s to a well-earned deep breath before the next adventure!
* and by next adventure I mean the TWENTY NINE tests we get to film and review for the DDC virtual show * 🙌

02/04/2025

Had a blast supporting DDC at the show this weekend! 🐴🌞

My awesome teens shook off some rust from their last showing and braved the unpredictable TX February weather, only to be rewarded with sunshine and *perfect* temps! 🌤️
Both girls got some valuable learning opportunities and handled it with grace and maturity.

Ila M. rode Got To Be Streaking with great confidence and care, especially considering Sunbeam’s unique anatomical challenges. Her tests were consistent all weekend, and she's really starting to think independently in the ring instead of just “letting the test happen to her.” Growth in action!

Allissa G. deserves an award for bravery for surviving the weekend with her fiery dragon—err, horse—Chief of Cash. 🔥🐉 Despite challenges, Allissa stayed calm and demonstrated impressive composure. Sometimes the phrase “winning the warmup” feels overrated, but Allissa did just that on Sunday. There were moments in the warmup where Chief relaxed and stretched beautifully into the contact just like he does at home... but this was quite the feat considering we had to lead him around the show grounds!
We’ll get it in the show ring, we just need more field trips.

Both girls were fantastic teammates—polite, helpful, and just great horsewomen all around. Couldn’t ask for better.

Also, big thank you to the attending families who brought not only great attitudes but also amazing snacks. You’re the real MVPs of the weekend 🍪👏

I’ll leave the photo-sharing to family (there are a LOT!), as I always want to respect my students' privacy. 💕

12/19/2024

08/29/2024

A break in between evening lessons- sometimes the teenagers deserve a little fun 🤩💃🏻

03/28/2024

Both horses AND students have been uncharacteristically naughty or distracted for the last couple of weeks.
Some of this behavior can be attributed to the spring weather and the large number of mares in the program coming into season; however, I had a fun conversation with a client this evening questioning if the upcoming solar eclipse was adding to the insanity!

With that in mind, I’ve been thinking recently what characteristics are attributed to the best students and athletes.
Here’s a hot take:

The ability to take a risk and fail, in my opinion, is what separates the rising stars from the rest of the herd.

For my human students: the ability to listen to your instructor and try things outside of your comfort zone will define you as a student and athlete.
*EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU KNOW BEST AND OUR INSTRUCTION WILL NOT APPLY TO YOU*

No, a trainer or coach should NOT be asking you to preform tasks that could potentially land you in a dangerous situation.
HOWEVER, trust the professional.
Humor me… if I’ve asked you to put your outside hand down 800,000x I will NOT be upset if you get a little fed up with my instruction and over-correct 😉
Lendon Gray once jumped me (and maybe made me cry after I got off my horse) saying “Don’t make the same mistake twice” and truer words have never been spoken.

*I’m climbing up on my soap box*
At the end of the day, you have scouted your instructor and hired them for a service. Maybe attempt their instruction before you declare they don’t know what they’re talking about ?
*climbs off of soap box*

Yes, me repeating “Make the neck straighter on the outside rein” may be some serious job security- but if you’re a student who hears this 30x per lesson, I might give you a high five if I ever instruct you to “create a little more inside flexion”
Try different things. Make different mistakes.

You may *think* you know it all, but humor the person you’ve hired and actually entertain our instruction… see what happens.

Trial and error is one of the BEST ways to learn.

Now, for my equine students (who of course I know are monitoring this page and lingering on my every last word):
Those with the ability to “eat up a challenge” will go the distance.

The horse may not be the most athletic or the most intelligent 🫣
However, a horse who isn’t opposed to a challenge and trusts in a rider enough to entertain new things will go far AND will be a joy to train.

I know you’ve all heard me say “come on, let’s eat up this exercise!” 😉

With that being said!! I am out of office until next week- please try to contain your chaos until my return next week.
I promise we will get through this eclipse (and the bipolar spring weather) together!

12/15/2023

Rarely post pre-clinic, but I’m looking forward to a fabulous weekend in Tulsa (oopsy- Claremore) Oklahoma!
It’s gonna be great to see some new faces AND *torture* old friends 🥰🐴

11/26/2023

NETX DC Show is a wrap!
Today we toast Allissa! 🥂

Chief didn’t get the memo that Thanksgiving has already passed and was the ultimate turkey.
I am *SO* proud of Allissa for her perseverance and determination to get the job done 💪

Allissa was ALSO crowned today’s junior champion!
Congratulations girls on a successful weekend!

11/25/2023

Saturday of NETX DC is complete!
Huge congratulations to Ila, who wanted everyone to know she’s the junior champion! 💙

Onto tomorrow!