10/31/2021
Thoughts from a dog trainer and human in training:
Here's how negative reinforcement works in the dog world: In order to use negative reinforcement, something aversive has to be applied first so that it can then be removed contingent on the dog doing the behavior you are teaching.
In other words, apply something painful, uncomfortable or some undesirable impact to the dog/animal. That is taken away when the dog performs to the human standard. So you teach the dog that in order to make the unwanted thing NOT happen, the dog must conform to the command given.
In the human world, we see this all the time. People are treated horribly, yelled at, cussed at, blamed, pushed away, etc. That 'treatment' is taken away (and sometimes affection, attention, feigned respect is temporarily shown) when the person does the thing that meets approval. The stopping of the yelling or negative treatment will stop conditionally if all things the person wants are received. As people, we naturally want love and acceptance so it is a easy and somewhat addictive trap to fall into. Humans will start to predict (with fear) what will happen if they aren't meeting approval and the knee jerk reaction is to anticipate and try to stop the negative before it happens. With dogs as well as humans, more often than not, the person(s) applying the negative reinforcer is/are always looking for new ways to apply it. This is a pattern that can go on for years.
I'm sure you have all seen the videos of frightened animals or dogs that were abused. They live in fear of the negative reinforcer or the person administering it. With animals, it is incredibly painful to watch dogs shiver in a corner from fear of "the next time".
People create this same fear in family members, employees, kids that are bullied at school, etc. They relish in the power it creates and the damage that it does. It is mean. It is evil. Sometimes, the damage done is so bad that it tears into your heart. You want to heal the injured soul. You want them to know they are worthy of love. They are worthy of kind language, soft words, a gentle touch, kindness and respect.
At the end of the day, you are your actions, the words you use, the intent in which you speak or type them and joy or regret you have for your choices. Unfortunately there are those that choose horrible words intentionally and hurtfully. The swirl of negativity and drama is intended to derail your happiness, or at a minimum, to get from you what they want. You have no control over who they are or when this will happen. But you......you can rise up. You can be the person who uses positive reinforcement to combat the negative. Decide to bring joy to those who deserve your love. For those that don't, wish them peace and happiness. Surround yourself with people that truly care about who you are and how you are.
Please be kind to each other. If you can't be kind, please don't intentionally be mean. You sometimes think you know the whole story about someone, but I guarantee that you don't. Open your heart to listen.
There are people and animals out there that have lived their lives being subjected to negative reinforcement. Let them know they matter. Be kind. Be the difference they need in their lives. What a wonderful life-changing gift you can give.
