10/17/2025
BORROWED
No breeder escapes this moment: the phone buzzes a few days after a puppy leaves, with a message you could almost recite by heart:
āWe love him, butā¦ā
Ah, the infamous but.
But he barks. But he nips. But he cries at night. But heās ātoo energetic.ā
In short, heās alive. And for some, thatās already too much.
A puppy isnāt a living stuffed animal or a personal antidepressant. Itās a baby mammal, uprooted from its maternal world, thrown into the unknown. It will bark, cry, explore, and stressāand thatās normal.
Modern humans, however, donāt like disturbance. They want everything fast: their coffee, their phone, even their puppyās āadaptation.ā They forget a puppyās brain is still learning emotional regulation through experience, not downloads or miracle TikTok tricks.
So overwhelmed families write: āHeās adorable, but heās not for us.ā Translation: We wanted a dog without the challenges of a puppy.
Even the best-raised puppies are still learning. They arrive ready to learn to love, not pre-programmed to love. And learning requires time, consistency, and emotional steadinessāqualities many humans no longer possess.
Some confuse the perfect puppy with the compliant puppyāobedient to their schedule, whims, or noise tolerance. When that fails, blame follows: the breeder, the breed, the dogās ācharacter.ā And suddenly normal puppy behavior becomes a āproblem.ā
Breeders absorb it all, taking back puppies āreturned due to lifestyle incompatibility,ā re-socializing them, and repairing broken bonds. They brush trembling little muzzles and remind themselves: humans think they can adopt without adapting.
Living with a puppy is chaos before harmony. Itās the noise, the smells, the nips, the accidents, the doubts. Itās biology, not magic.
A puppy isnāt a test, a trial, or a gift. Itās a living commitment. What it becomes depends on you: balanced if you are, anxious if you are.
And if youāre not ready to give up your slippers and certainties for a few months? Adopt a plant instead. It rarely chews your shoes, and it doesnāt cry at night.