Detersmination Equestrian Center

05/10/2025

This is a long read but so true. I hope others see me as the one who “shows up”. I love the challenge of rehabbing and caring for your horse. But the truth is they, like other animals can’t tell you what is bothering them.

Animals Get Sick. Period.

It doesn’t matter where they are located — a vet, a breeder, a rescue, or at your friends house — animals get sick. Horses, dogs, goats, cats, birds, exotics — it’s all the same. Illness happens. Injury happens. Sometimes without warning, and often without someone to “blame.”

If you own animals, it is your responsibility to step up and care for them, especially in the hard moments.
Not to point fingers. 🫵🏻
Not to ask “who can I hold accountable?”
But to do what needs to be done.

Animals are not products. They are living beings. And just like children — they do, and will, get sick. That’s life. That’s nature. That’s reality.

Especially horses. Horses are a gamble. You can do everything right and still lose. You can pour your soul into a foal, a mare, or a show horse — and one day, things still go sideways.

I’ve been doing this well over 10 years. I’ve watched countless friends fight with everything they have to save sick foals, downed mares, colics, mystery cases, and gut-wrenching diagnoses.
And this year alone? It’s been a DOOZY.
I’ve seen hearts break left and right. 🥺
But I’ve also seen those same people keep showing up — for the love of it. For the animals.

Because for those of us truly in it — the good far outweighs the bad.
But let’s not pretend: when the bad hits, it hits HARD.

And I’ll be honest — the ones I’ve seen fall the fastest when things go wrong? They’re usually the ones who didn’t grow up in this life.
Didn’t grow up watching calves die in the night.
Didn’t grow up burying ponies in the cold.
Didn’t learn that loss is part of the lifestyle.
That grit is required.
That heartbreak is guaranteed.

Now don’t get me wrong — I know folks who’ve stepped away too. But they’re the wise ones who’ve earned that peace. Their families are grown and their time is well spent elsewhere. That’s different. That’s grace.

But for anyone who’s entering this world — or trying to toe the edge of it — let me say it clearly:

Animals are not accessories. They are not guarantees.
If you’re not ready for the responsibility, the risk, the heartbreak, and the heavy lifting — then maybe animals, especially farm life or breeding, just aren’t for you.

Because they WILL get sick.
And you have to be the one who shows up — monetarily and with time and heart — every single time.

To my fellow warriors out there still showing up through the hard — I see you. I’m with you. Keep going. They’re worth it. 💚

04/29/2025

I bit worried about my hubby looking for something for lunch today. Keeping the stallion semen cold till vet is available. Only horse people get this.

04/11/2025

You can tell it’s spring! Introducing Absolutely Johnnys Joker. Now 1 1/2 weeks old. Born on April fools day. Farm is bursting at the seams. Briths, breeding, lessons, training and show tune-ups. And, two weeks till our first show. Busy!!!!

12/30/2024

She’s come a long way. A year and half ago vet suggested we consider putting her down. Faces with a severed ligament, MRSA, weight lose, no appetite but I believe in miracles.

10/23/2024

This is why I prefer you give your horse a week or two of just hanging out. No expectations. Time to chill.

"New Home Syndrome"🤓

I am coining this term to bring recognition, respect, and understanding to what happens to horses when they move homes. This situation involves removing them from an environment and set of routines they have become familiar with, and placing them somewhere completely different with new people and different ways of doing things.

Why call it a syndrome?

Well, really it is! A syndrome is a term used to describe a set of symptoms that consistently occur together and can be tied to certain factors such as infections, genetic predispositions, conditions, or environmental influences. It is also used when the exact cause of the symptoms is not fully understood or when it is not connected with a well-defined disease. In this case, "New Home Syndrome" is connected to a horse being placed in a new home where its entire world changes, leading to psychological and physiological impacts. While it might be transient, the ramifications can be significant for both the horse and anyone handling or riding it.

Let me explain...

Think about how good it feels to get home after a busy day. How comfortable your favourite clothes are, how well you sleep in your own bed compared to a strange bed, and how you can really relax at home. This is because home is safe and familiar. At home, the part of you that keeps an eye out for potential danger turns down to a low setting. It does this because home is your safe place (and if it is not, this blog will also explain why a lack of a safe place is detrimental).

Therefore, the first symptom of horses experiencing "New Home Syndrome" is being unsettled, prone to anxiety, or difficult behaviour. If you have owned them before you moved them, you struggle to recognise your horse, feeling as if your horse has been replaced by a frustrating version. If the horse is new to you, you might wonder if you were conned, if the horse was drugged when you rode it, or if you were lied to about the horse's true nature.

A horse with "New Home Syndrome" will be a stressed version of itself, on high alert, with a drastically reduced ability to cope. Horses don't handle change like humans do. If you appreciate the comfort of your own home and how you can relax there, you should be able to understand what the horse is experiencing.

Respecting that horses interpret and process their environments differently from us helps in understanding why your horse is being frustrating and recognising that there is a good chance you were not lied to or that the horse was not drugged.

Horses have survived through evolution by being highly aware of their environments. Change is a significant challenge for them because they notice the slightest differences, not just visually but also through sound, smell, feel, and other senses. Humans generalise and categorise, making it easy for us to navigate familiar environments like shopping centres. Horses do not generalise in the same way; everything new is different to them, and they need proof of safety before they can habituate and feel secure. When their entire world changes, it is deeply stressful.

They struggle to sleep until they feel safe, leading to sleep deprivation and increased difficulty.

But there is more...

Not only do you find comfort in your home environment and your nervous system downregulates, but you also find comfort in routines. Routines are habits, and habits are easy. When a routine changes or something has to be navigated differently, things get difficult. For example, my local supermarket is undergoing renovations. After four years of shopping there, it is extremely frustrating to have to work out where everything is now. Every day it gets moved due to the store being refitted section by section. This annoyance is shared by other shoppers and even the staff.

So, consider the horse. Not only are they confronted with the challenge of figuring out whether they are safe in all aspects of their new home while being sleep deprived, but every single routine and encounter is different. Then, their owner or new owner starts getting critical and concerned because the horse suddenly seems untrained or difficult. The horse they thought they owned or bought is not meeting their expectations, leading to conflict, resistance, explosiveness, hypersensitivity, and frustration.

The horse acts as if it knows little because it is stressed and because the routines and habits it has learned have disappeared. If you are a new human for the horse, you feel, move, and communicate differently from what it is used to. The way you hold the reins, your body movements in the saddle, the position of your leg – every single routine of communication between horse and person is now different. I explain to people that when you get a new horse, you have to imprint yourself and your way of communicating onto the horse. You have to introduce yourself and take the time to spell out your cues so that they get to know you.

Therefore, when you move a horse to a new home or get a new horse, your horse will go through a phase called "New Home Syndrome," and it will be significant for them. Appreciating this helps them get through it because they are incredible and can succeed. The more you understand and help the horse learn it is safe in its new environment and navigate the new routines and habits you introduce, the faster "New Home Syndrome" will pass.
"New Home Syndrome" will be prevalent in a horse’s life until they have learned to trust the safety of the environment (and all that entails) and the humans they meet and interact with. With strategic and understanding approaches, this may take weeks, and their nervous systems will start downgrading their high alert status. However, for some horses, it can take a couple of years to fully feel at ease in their new home.

So, next time you move your horse or acquire a new horse and it starts behaving erratically or being difficult, it is not being "stupid", you might not have been lied to or the horse "drugged" - your horse is just experiencing an episode of understandable "New Home Syndrome." And you can help this.❤

I would be grateful if you could please share, this reality for horses needs to be better appreciated ❤
‼️When I say SHARE that does not mean plagiarise my work…it is seriously not cool to copy and paste these words and make out you have written it yourself‼️

08/13/2024

I didn’t write this but, it is pretty much spot on. I have a great bunch of boarders. It has taken me almost two decades to get to this point so I share this for my fellow barn owners/ trainers out there!

Lessons learned long and hard in the horse business as a professional..

1. It's easy to fall in love with your customers. They become a family who you spend a lot of time with. However, in the end they will do what's best for themselves. And, for you and them, those paths may not be the same. Prepare to get your heart broken. Keep business and personal relationships separate.

2. People will not always trust in your experience and will second guess you. They will think they know better because they read it in a book, or saw it online. Don't try to be all things to all people. Do what you are good at. Run your barn in a way that you can sleep at night knowing that you did right in your mind by them and their horses. The clients opinion of that may be different than your beliefs, but you have to live with choices that leave you at peace. That may mean confrontation, hard conversations and even asking people to move on for your own peace.

3. Horses are easy 99% of the time. It's the people who come with them that make things complicated.

4. Remember that horses need to be horses.

5. People will always judge you, and have opinions. The better you are, the more haters will have opinions.

6. Success isn't measured by ribbons and show placings. It's measured in happy animals and the quality of their lives.

7. There is always an exception or quirk that doesn't " follow the rules" in horse care. Do what works, not what the books say works.

8. When you get annoyed by seeing somebody's car pull in to the barn, it's time to let that person move on. Your barn should be a happy place. It literally only takes one bad sour apple to ruin the whole atmosphere and dynamic in a barn.

9. Let it go.... if someone moves on don't be upset by it. Ignore what they say. Don't take it personally. Every barn is not a good fit for every person.

10. This is a business. If a person or horse isn't working for you, or the compensation isn't offsetting your cost, it's time for them to go. The exception to this is your retired horses, see #11.

11. Horses only have so many jumps, so many runs, so many rides. Don’t waste your horses. Teach your students they aren’t machines. You owe it to your retired horses to have a safe, comfortable and dignified end. Your schoolies worked for you. When the time comes they can no longer do that, either give them a pleasant retirement, or put them in the ground where you know they are safe. Do not dump them at auctions or onto other people where you are not 100% sure that they will be cared for.

12. There is no shame in euthanasia for a horse owner. Always better a week too early then a second too late. Do not judge anyone for their reasons for doing this.

13. Most clients fall Into two categories. Those who are "high maintenance", open in their opinions and will confront situations head on. The second is the quiet type who will not say a word and will not openly talk with you about their expectations or issues. You have no idea they have a problem until it's too late. The people in between these two are the clients you want. They will be long term and make life easy.

14. Know your worth. KNOW YOUR WORTH. Your time and experience has a monetary value. Don't do things for free, even if you like the person. Every bit of time or effort you give to clients has value. So when you don't value your effort, neither will a client. They will come to expect "freebies", which always leads to resentment from someone.

15. Be honest. It's not always easy. But in this business it takes forever to build reputation and seconds to destroy it.

16. Remember horses are dangerous. Always use your best judgment and air on the side of caution when working with horses and students. Their lives and your own life can change in an instant.

17. Get paid up front. Keep good records. People don't go to the grocery store and ask for food they will pay for next week. Good business practices keep everyone honest and sets boundaries for clients.

18. Normalize passing on price increases. Service industries, especially ones like ours always "feel guilty " when raising prices. You are not there to subsidize someone else's horse habit. Prices have been going up on costs, so should your fees.

19. The buck stops with you. Your employees mistakes fall back to your responsibility. Always verify and check on important care aspects of daily activities.

20. Make time for family and rest. Too many of us get burnt out from the stress of expectations in this industry. In the end, boarders and students come and go. Your family is who you will have left.

Thanks for reading my thoughts. I hope it can help support some of you feeling burnt out, and maybe help some people who are starting out in their journey into this industry.

Written by Rhea Distefano

08/11/2024

It’s been a long journey. She may always have a slight gimp but I saved her. Three days after she arrived, she saw herself in the mirror and kicked the mirror and through 3/4 inch plywood. Got stitched up, stitches evulsed, she got MRSA, vet recommended euthanasia, I couldn’t afford $16,000/day drug, so thanks to my extended Amish family for recommending burdock leaf, my research into Sugar/Honey poultice, red light lazer, OsteoMax, theraplate treatments, Bremer,Magnawave,& PF salve. But mostly the prayers people prayed and my diligence in daily wound care and physical therapy I found my gift : rehab