07/25/2026
Lmao
So I finally had a long talk with my neighbor today about her obsession with my stallion Murphy’s “stallion behavior “. This is kind of a long post so grab yourself a cold drink , a snack and sit back.
I originally tried to talk to her on Thursday, but no one answered the door. Today while I was walking my Golden Retriever Francisco ( that’s fun to say) she came out by her mailbox to give me s**t about being on her property yesterday . The irony of this is comical at this point . She looked down at Francis who rolled over for a belly scratch . She scrunched her nose and asked if I had any animals that were not men . Wow, let’s break this down for a second. First of all, they are not men, they are male animals. Second, she wouldn’t be able to handle my mares. If she thinks the boys are too much, she should see a mare in heat. There is no psycho level higher than a mare doing the winky winky dance .
She said she was getting too warm and needed to stand inside her house, but Francis and I are were not welcome because our souls are not clean . Which is complete BS because I just had them cleaned yesterday. As she was standing in her doorway I could not help but look past her into her house . Jesus H Christ ! No really she had a Jesus blanket and throw pillows on her couch . She told me two days ago that I needed to find God, well now I know why he was missing . She had God clocks , ornaments , and tapestries ( if you are under 40 look it up). I mean I’m religious to a point but this takes it to a whole new level . Where does she shop? Bed, Bath and Jesus????
OK I digress, back to her and my stallion Murphy . I told her that I had no trespassing signs up and that she has repeatedly ignored them. I told her if she was interested in Murphy that I could have her come over and meet him. She went absolutely irate and said she’s not into that kind of thing. I am not speechless very often, but this lady can continuously push me into that state. I told her “ you are not his type , I meant to feed him carrots and see what a nice boy he is .” She said she does not condone “lewd actions whether beast or human” I was honestly just proud that we were getting through to her that he’s not human. I tried to explain one more time why a horse with a p***s lets it hang out. I didn’t even go into the belly thumping again with her, I just tried to talk to her about basic necessity during hot weather. She said in all her years her Henry ( husband she lost 3 years ago) never resorted to that kind of behavior. Before I could stop myself I said “ well maybe he should have”. She slammed the door in my face. I remind her one more time through the closed door to stay off my property and leave my stallion Murphy alone , he’s just not that into her.
Francis and I walked home and I rate this whole encounter 2 stars out of 5. Tedious , do not recommend. I went home, gave Murphy an apple and told him he was the goodest of all good boys.
Pictured below is my Murphy ❤️👑
