06/18/2025
What if your dog or cat or horse likes somebody else more than they seem to like YOU? This can be really disheartening...animals do have preferences. But can you win their hearts if they've connected to somebody else?
Mostly, I think you can, but sometimes it takes having the 'other' person really step out of the picture (ignore them, not react to them, or not be around).
As a trainer I need to become liked by the animal as quickly as possible so they are willing to work with me, try things, and do stuff. But I don't want to be their one-person. I want to avoid being scary to them or being a target of any aggression or causing too much frustration. This means I'm very aware of their body language (I don't stare at them because I don't want to be threatening), and I let them tell me how much I can do with them...I want them to invite me. Then, seeing inviting or somewhat-inviting body language and knowing what most dogs, cats and horses like I offer that and see how they react.
How does this translate if you're supposed to be their one, but aren't? 1) Are you repeatedly doing something they dislike? Grabbing them, hugging them, petting at the wrong time/wrong place, dragging them away from things, constant tension on their collar, always wanting their attention when they are busy doing something else, interrupting their rest or meals? Using angry tones or threats to get them to do something?
Some of the most common disliked things are: 1) petting your dog, cat, horse on the head when you like what they just did, but they don't like being petted on their head...so they leave or quit doing whatever you were working on getting them to do. For people who do this, it's often an automatic reflex...so it's hard for them to even realize what they did. Video yourself! 2) calling your dog to you and then putting them in their kennel (if you haven't made their kennel a good place -by playing games or feeding inside it- they may consider it a punishment for coming to you). Whenever you call your dog, cat, horse to you think about whether what comes next is a 'good' thing as far as they are concerned or a 'bad' one. 3) suddenly stopping or starting to move or changing direction and dragging/pulling your dog's neck, , horse's mouth (it's one thing if you're playing a game of quick movements, it's another if you've just surprised them).
Do you know what they like best? 1) specific types of food 2) specific types of games 3) specific ways/places to be petted. The answer of my dog likes everything...means you don't really know your dog. And you need to if you're not the ONE person and you want to be.
