The Caffeinated Lizard

06/24/2026

06/24/2026

You guys know I have salamanders, too, right? So anyway, this is Wyatt Derp. Wyatt enjoys worms, roaches.... worms...and...ro — Wyatt enjoys eating.

If Wyatt required two brain cells to rub together for warmth, he would freeze.

If Wyatt believes something will fit in his mouth, he will try to put it there. He'll even use his "hands" to help force food into his face. His whole face is his mouth. Look at it.

Wyatt is a Tiger Salamander. I was actually told he was a salamander hybrid, but I have some doubts.

He's silly looking and looks like he's proud of eating paste at the craft table, but he's a pretty good fit here.

06/24/2026

So you think you want a legless lizard? This is the bare minimum.

06/23/2026

Ten years ago, he thought he had met "normal". I had my dog, Gadget, and no other pets. I didn't even really have any aspirations, to be honest. When we met, I told him I was crazy, he said "okay" and ran with it. It all kind of snowballed from there.
Eleven years later, he has tolerated my crazy. He tolerated me turning the basement into a small, tropical, personal zoo. He not only tolerated, but helped build a large lizard enclosure in the back yard. And to this day, despite how annoyed he gets, he still supports what I'm doing, now that I have found my aspirations.

06/23/2026

New Patreon post is up. It's been a while, my bad!

06/22/2026

You've seen him, but do you know him? This is Ripley, my Jeweled Lacerta! He's a curious little guy with a love for food so strong I can lure him in and out of his enclosure! Ripley, AKA Rip, AKA Ripper, loves snail meat, but he really will try to eat pretty much anything you put in front of him!

Dubias? Yup.
Mealworms? Absolutely.
Soldier Fly Larvae? All in!
Crickets? Aw, hell yeah!

Have you ever met a Jeweled Lacerta?

06/22/2026

It's officially summer, storm season is in full swing, and hurricane season has kicked off, too.

People report all kinds of behavioral changes in dogs, cats, birds and other animals when storms are on the horizon. Do you notice any changes in your reptiles?

06/21/2026

06/21/2026

Turtle Sanctuary Ecologist killed in Isreali attack in Lebanon

Mona Khalil led decades-long effort to protect nesting site for turtles near her home in south of the country