10/20/2025
☕️ Morning Tea with Archie ☕️
Well, well, well. Look who crawled back for another dose of chaos and canine commentary. It’s me — Archie Von Sassington III, your favorite gossip hound, reporting live from Eastside Animal Center where the coffee’s strong, the cases are wild, and the humans are one jump scare away from losing it entirely. 💅🐾
Let’s start with the obvious — Vet Tech Appreciation Week just wrapped up and, friends… it was pure pandemonium. 💚
Between emergencies, caffeine binges, and so many surprises that even I started flinching, the techs held it all together like the unsung heroes they are. We’re now buried under thank-you cards for the amazing businesses and clients who spoiled us — seriously, you all made our week. 🥰
Now about that mysterious “plumbing emergency.” 🚿
Early in the week, Kas swore up and down she wasn’t calling in sick… then Thursday rolls around and bam — catastrophic plumbing failure. 💧
Sure, Jan. 😏 Archie’s betting that “leak” was mostly tears and coffee. Probably spent the day in her comfort burrito blanket whispering, “I love my job, I love my job,” between sobs. (We’ve all been there, sweetheart.)
Meanwhile, Dr. Burge has been out of town all week, and you’d think we’d miss him… but Jaden took over his jump-scare duties with such dedication, it felt like Burge never left. The clinic’s been one scream away from a paranormal investigation. 👻 I’ve seen braver cats hide under less suspicious shadows.
Speaking of actual horror stories — let’s talk about this week’s crazy cases:
We had one intussusception, a healthy C-section, a pyometra, and an intestinal ileus — all in one week. 😮💨 Every pup pulled through like a champ, and our team deserves a standing ovation (or at least a nap). Physically, mentally, emotionally — we’re cooked. But if saving lives were a sport, Eastside would be going to state. 🏆🐶
Now, for those of you planning to get your real scares in, the Phantom Trail (sponsored by the Gothenburg Community Playhouse/Sun Theatre) is creeping closer! 🎭
It runs Oct 23–26 and Oct 30–31, and rumor has it several Eastside employees (and a few of our brave clients) will be out there scaring the pants off unsuspecting victims — uh, I mean visitors. If you hear maniacal laughter in the dark… it’s probably one of us.
And finally — fleas. 😤
Everyone thinks summer’s the worst, but oh no no no, fall is when the fleas throw their grand finale. The cool weather hits, they pack their tiny flea suitcases, and move right into your carpets like they pay rent.
But here’s the kicker — our home foggers are the real deal. They contain (S)-Methoprene, a special ingredient that kills not just adult fleas, but their eggs and larvae too. Most foggers don’t do that, which means ours actually break the cycle — instead of giving you a six-legged comeback tour later.
And here’s the golden rule: if you’re dealing with an infestation, keep your pets on consistent flea prevention for at least six months. Trust me, you can’t win a war with just one can and a prayer.
That’s all the tea I’ve got for you this week, folks. Between Burge’s vanishing act, Jaden’s terror tactics, and Kas’s “plumbing problems,” I’d say this clinic’s haunted enough without needing an exorcist.
Stay spooky, stay sassy, and remember — if you hear a scream from the treatment room, it’s probably not a ghost… just a vet tech running on caffeine and adrenaline. 💅🐾
— Archie Von Sassington III
Your local gossip hound, jump-scare survivor, and flea-fighting expert 👻
