10/30/2025
My dog stopped mid-stride one morning, ears pricked, tail frozen. His eyes fixed on something I couldn’t see. No squirrel. No sound. Just stillness, and him, sensing something I couldn’t fathom. I waited, puzzled, as he stood firm, like a sentry tuned to a frequency I’ll never access. That moment stayed with me. What does he know that I don’t?
That quiet question, what if I could see the world through my dog’s eyes? is exactly what neuroscientist Gregory Berns explores in How Dogs Love Us. What began as a simple curiosity turned into an extraordinary scientific journey. He taught dogs to lie still in an fMRI scanner, not for treats or fear, but for love and trust. Why? Because he wanted to find out what dogs feel, not just what they do, but who they are. And what he discovered moved me deeply. Here are five lessons from this remarkable book:
1. Dogs Feel Emotionally, Not Just Instinctively
For years, I assumed my dog’s excitement when I came home was reflexive. Conditioning. A learned behavior. But Berns’ brain scans show something more: the caudate nucleus, the same part of the brain that activates in human joy and love, lights up in dogs when they see their owners. It’s not a trick. It’s not a treat. It’s love. Quiet. Simple. Real.
2. Their Brains Are Wired for Connection
Berns’ work revealed how similar parts of our brains and our dogs’ brains activate in moments of anticipation, trust, and joy. Not because dogs mimic us, but because, in a real biological sense, they are bonded to us. They remember our scent, recognize our voice, miss us when we leave. It’s not just behavior—it’s brain chemistry.
2. Trust Is the Foundation of Canine Intelligence
The dogs Berns worked with had to volunteer—literally. No force, no sedation. They had to walk into the scanner, lie down, and stay still. For science. It was trust that made it possible. This taught me that the smartest dog isn’t the one who obeys the most commands, but the one who feels safe enough to choose cooperation over fear.
3. They Know Who We Are—Not Just Our Scent
Dogs don’t just recognize their people by smell. They know them. Berns's research showed that dogs react more strongly to the scent of their human than to any other. It’s not just about food or familiarity—it’s about belonging. Your dog doesn’t just live with you. They carry you inside them.
4. Dogs Are Conscious Beings, Deserving of Agency
This book challenged the old notion that dogs are trainable but thoughtless. If they’re conscious—and Berns argues compellingly that they are—then maybe we need to stop thinking of them as pets and more as partners. They’re not here to serve us. They’re here to be with us. And that difference changes everything.
5. Love, When Given Freely, Is Returned in Full
What moved me most wasn’t the science; it was what it revealed: that love is not a one-way street. Berns’s dog, Callie, chose to participate in the study because of love, not command. In a world where animals are often controlled, this experiment was an act of respect. And it showed that when love is freely given, dogs give it back, fully and without hesitation.
Reading How Dogs Love Us changed the way I look at my own companion. I stopped seeing him as a creature I care for and began seeing him as someone I share life with. Someone who thinks, feels, remembers, and chooses—not a person in fur, but a dog in full.
It reminded me that love doesn’t always need language. Sometimes it’s in the way he looks up at me, in the soft weight of his head resting on my knee, in the sigh he lets out when the day quiets down. Sometimes it’s in a pause on a trail, where he senses something I can’t name, and I simply trust him.
I still don’t hear what he hears or smell what he smells. But now, when he stops at the edge of the path, I don’t rush him. I wonder. I listen. I honor that unseen world he knows so well. And in that stillness, for a moment, we meet—two different species, one shared heartbeat.
BOOK: https://amzn.to/3Ja3mjL
