05/27/2026
π¨ BREAKING NEWS: LOCAL 17-LB TERROR SEEKS FOREVER COMPANION π¨
Are you looking for a loving, affectionate, sweet, jaunty little lady tramp? Look no further than Lady Penelope Sato (aka Penny)! ππΎ
Penny is the ultimate "package deal," meaning she comes with a lot of personality and a few... letβs call them "exclusive features":
Attachment Style: She has some separation anxiety but if she has her canine buddy she can get over herself! π₯Ί
The Bathroom Situation: Sheβs mostly reliably potty trained... but she also views p*e pads as her personal indoor VIP lounges. π½β¨
Stranger Danger is real, folks, until it's not. Usually about 5 minutes. π
The Napoleon Complex: At a whopping 17 pounds, Penny feels it is her civic duty to let other dogs know she is big, bad, and running these streets. ππ₯ (But don't worry, once she asserts her absolute authority, sheβll graciously allow them to be her best friend).
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE! On the positive note...
The Ultimate WFH Colleague: Working from home? Penny is the employee of the month, every month. She will sit by your side, judge your Zoom meetings, and ensure you take mandatory cuddle breaks. π»π©βπ»
ISO a Partner-in-Crime: She highly prefers a home with another canine buddy to collude with. Every criminal mastermind needs a sidekick for their minor household conspiracies. πβπ¦Ίπ΅οΈββοΈ
She is a crate-loving queen! π°
She sleeps soundly through the night (building up energy for tomorrow's drama). π΄
She gives the absolute BEST hugs. π€β€οΈ
If youβre ready for a life of morning cuddles, corporate supervisor energy, and protecting your 17-lb boss lady from the world, Penny is waiting for you!