05/11/2022
It's not about being obedient, it's about the trust and confidence in the relationship. If your pet doesn't want to be around you why would it listen to you??
What if I told you obedience doesn't matter?
Hold your horses.
I’m not saying “obedience” is bad…
Although personally, I’m not a fan of the word.
It always drums up thoughts of school days back when rulers across knuckles were a thing (I didn’t experience this, but I’ve seen it in enough movies to have a vivid image in my mind).
But that’s beside the point.
Truth is, I used to believe that the way to fixing behavior was through control.
And the easiest way to control a dog was through obedience.
Don’t want your dog to pull?
Teach a formal heel, and then make them do it.
Don’t want your dog to be rude in public?
Make them sit…
Or down-stay instead.
Don’t want them to be naughty in the house?
Make them lay on a dog bed and stay there.
And listen…
I’m not saying that teaching these things can’t help at times.
But back when I had my first dog…
I believed that obedience was the solution to everything.
In fact, the very first thing I did when I brought him home was enrolled him in a group obedience class.
And boy let me tell you…
That was one of the most frustrating and embarrassing endeavors of my life.
My dog alligator rolling at the end of his leash, straining against his collar and spitting out the hot dogs we were trying to use to get him to sit as he gasped and piulled to get to the other dogs.
I went through countless trainers, all with different methods, learning about obedience as a solution to my many problems.
But none of the sits…
The downs…
The begged…
And later forced heel…
Dealt with the emotions driving my dog’s behavior.
And they sure as heck never dealt with my relationship with my dog…
Which was sorely out of whack.
My dog didn’t need obedience…
He needed confidence…
He needed coping skills…
He needed an outlet for his energy and drive…
And he needed someone on the other end of his leash who he could trust…
And who he understood.
Because had he had those things…
That hard fought obedience would have been a breeze.
And the problems we experienced wouldn’t have been problems at all.
