04/06/2026
One thing I think is often misunderstood about cats is that the goal isn’t to have a cat that tolerates being cuddled.
The goal is to have a cat that chooses to be with you.
There’s a very big difference between the two.
Try this thought experiment.
Imagine you are a cat living in a house with two other cats. One of those cats just happens to be much bigger than the rest.
That’s actually how your cat probably sees you.
They don’t spend their day thinking, “This is my human.”
To them, you’re simply part of their social group. A much larger, slightly strange looking cat that they share their space with.
Now imagine if you were one of those cats.
Would you spend all day chasing the others around, picking them up, hugging them, and forcing them to cuddle with you?
Probably not.
Most cats simply enjoy being in each other’s presence. They nap together. Sit near each other. Follow each other from room to room. Sometimes they don’t even interact at all.
And that’s perfectly normal.
Three cats sleeping quietly together is normal.
One cat constantly trying to hug another cat is not. The other cat would probably hiss and wonder what on earth is wrong with you.
The same idea applies to our relationship with them.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is… nothing.
Sit nearby.
Read a book.
Watch TV.
Work on your laptop.
Let your cat discover that being around you feels safe, predictable and comfortable.
Over time, many cats will start choosing to sit beside you, sleep next to you, follow you around the house, or climb onto your lap.
Not because they have to.
But because they want to.
And in my opinion, that’s one of the purest forms of trust a cat can give. ❤️
