27/04/2025
VETERINARIANS ARE HEARTLESS?
Sometimes, I wonder if people think we are.
You rush your pet to the clinic, emotions high, heart pounding. Your vet, on the other hand, stays calm. Focused. Maybe even finds time to explain what’s happening while their team works in the background.
And when the worst happens, when we have to deliver the news you dread, we do not cry with you. We stay steady. We stay professional. And sometimes, that makes people think we do not care.
It reminds me of the Yeng Constantino incident a few years ago in Siargao. In the middle of fear and panic, she lashed out at the medical team trying to help her husband. Later, she owned up to it. She apologized publicly and learned that when emotions run wild, judgment can get clouded.
It happens in veterinary medicine too.
One day at Cassa de Perro Veterinary Clinic, a blocked male cat came in. My colleague worked quickly, surgery went smoothly, and we were all feeling good about it. My boyfriend can see the patient inside the recovery room, watching proudly, asking questions like a curious kid.
An hour later, the tech came in, looking serious. The cat had passed during recovery.
The room filled with sadness as we informed the owners. While giving them space, I noticed my boyfriend wiping his tears. He pulled me aside and asked, "How can you do this every day? How come you are not crying?"
And for a moment, I asked myself too: "Have I become heartless?"
The truth is, I have not. None of us have.
We care deeply. We just cannot show it the same way. If we crumbled every time we lost a patient, we would not last a year in this job.
It is not that we are cold. It is that we have learned to carry the sadness quietly so we can keep helping others who still need us.
Compassion fatigue is very real in our profession. Building emotional walls is not a choice. It is survival.
If you are a pet parent reading this, please be kind. Do not let your grief turn into accusations. We have seen families lash out in anger. We have had to file police blotters. We have sat through ugly complaints and all because grief made people forget that vets are human, too.
And yet, there are cases that still haunt us.
This little monkey we are assessing in the photo? One of those. I still think about him.
If you have ever wondered what it feels like to be on this side of the exam table, this is it.
We laugh, we cry (sometimes when nobody is watching), and we love what we do even when it breaks our hearts.
If you have ever felt this too, I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments.
