16/10/2019
🇬🇧🤣 THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO DOG TRAINERS!
I have seen that many of my colleagues are having a bit of a rough time at the moment, so wrote this tongue in cheek to give a bit of light relief. If you happen to relate to any of these it’s nothing personal just a coincidence 😂
“He just LOVES other dogs!”
Translation 🚨: “will chase elderly neighbour over four fields away going what they think will be a lovely relaxing afternoon stroll in the mid morning autumnal sunshine at a leisurely pace, in order to repeatedly hump her equally elderly Yorkie as she frantically tries to drag her away. In all honesty, quite frankly if he was a hooman he would be on a register somewhere”
“She’s NEVER done that before!”
Translation 🚨: Has done at least six times.
“He’s a rescue, and we think he’s been beaten with household appliances”
Translation 🚨: Hates the Hoover, universal sworn enemy of the dog, rescue or not.
“He won’t come back when called, we have had to pick him up 5 miles away from where we walk, he hates other dogs, is scared of everything, nervous of men, bites if you try to take anything off him, but I couldn’t say no and allow them to kick him out again”
Translation 🚨: Romanian Street Dog, not adjusting to modern non savvy family life, keeps trying to go home to normal habitat, but owner has been guilted to pay hundreds of £££s with no rescue backup to take him on as ticks all the stereotypical middle class boxes, dog would probably have better mental health with appropriate authorities being educated out there than in total overwhelm with a poor sod of a hooman that is making it up as they go along and accidentally making things worse by taking well meaning advice of Bobette that has had shepherds for 40 years down the park.
“I’m sorry, I’ve spoilt her”
Translation 🚨: “I’ve tried to do my best to ensure I meet her mental and physical needs but we have done no formal training and my family keep telling me I need to show I’m pack leader but I really am struggling how to use modern training methods, help!”
“He’s good as gold, can we skip puppy class?”
Translation 🚨: “he knows sit, down, paw, leave it and come and is fully toilet trained in my living room, garden and local park unless there is ”
“Sh*t what have I taken on?”
Translation 🚨: You are a completely normal, well educated responsible dog owner that is having that mini breakdown every caring new pup owner has within a month of bringing them home but some don’t have the balls/ovaries to admit it publically!
Dog trainers, feel free to add your own!