28/02/2013
And so....I finally have the energy and the heart to post probably my last post...and put Hollington to bed. I feel a bit mouth wobbly writing it....as to write it is to accept what's happened and I have been avoiding it like the plague....my woods are empty, devoid of life...I can hardly bring myself to walk through there....no one there to greet me....it's strange...sad....I've had this idiot condition for years...since I was 19...I'm now 38...it's complicated...totally not life threatening....but totally debilitating...it never used to cause too much trouble appeared every 5 years or so, for a few days...I'd go into hospital for treatment...it'd go. It plagued me when I was pregnant and then came back last year twice....and was prolonged...we nearly had to give up the pigs then....but managed to get through it...we didn't expect to grow so much...it all just took off which kind of makes it even more frustrating.... I had recovered well thinking ohhhh it's cooooowellllllll probably just a one off....it wasn't...it returned just before christmas and I've been in and out of hospital since...with over a hundred pigs to feed care for and manage costing over £1000 a month to feed....and treatment for my condition coming up which can make you worse before you get better....keeping the herd wasn't an option...Adam can't go to work and do my job plus look after the house and Mia while I'm being a demic....so we had no choice but to rehome them all, all my girls, my Jim...piglets growers finished pigs....heartbroken cannot even touch the edge of how I feel.....it was my dream..... but, I am lucky to have been able to do it for the short while it was here, not everyone can say that....I know my gang is safe, felicity, Veronica, Violet, barger and Rosie along with Jimlad have gone to the breed rep for saddlebacks who bred Jim in the first place...they are important to him....they are cared for and happy...I wonder how he will cope with rosies bum nudge and excited bum bite every morning :) Jim will be a stud pig as he is special....fanny and tinkerbell have gone to live on a 100 acre rarebreed farm in devon...and primrose my dear darling primrose....she has gone to hill view farm in thatcham....I've seen her since...she farrowed 14 on monday....they called me over to see her it was amazing as always but sad....as she's no longer mine.....the last 4 years whilst I've been building up my herd has been amazing...I just want to say thankyou all for supporting us...to meet you all has been one of the high points of my life.....it's been fun, sad, hilarious, gutting, mad, MENTAL, satisfying, weird, and brilliant and I won't forget it in a hurry.....SO....thanks again and have fun :) cx
