05/11/2026
A few conversations recently have stayed with me.
Guardians trying to find a way forward, who have been left feeling confused and sometimes uncomfortable by advice they’ve received from professionals or found online.
There’s so much information available. When it comes with strong opinions about what you *must* do, it can become difficult to work out what feels appropriate for you and your dog.
It brought me back to something I wrote a couple of years ago: **positive isn’t the same as permissive.**
I still agree with that. Though now I’d want to say more about what kind, ethical training actually involves.
Think about learning something unfamiliar yourself. Perhaps you’re following instructions, but there’s a step missing. Perhaps you understood it at home, yet struggle when someone is watching or there’s lots happening around you.
What might help?
A clearer explanation? A quieter space? Breaking the task into smaller steps? Someone noticing that you’re getting frustrated, uncomfortable or tired?
Those are useful questions to ask about our dogs, too.
Teaching a skill involves more than finding a reward a dog likes. We need to consider what we’re asking, what they’ve had an opportunity to learn, and whether they can manage it in that particular moment.
Their emotional state, physical comfort, previous experiences and surroundings all matter. A puppy exploring with their mouth, an adolescent struggling to settle and an older dog becoming less tolerant may need quite different support, even where the behaviour looks similar.
There’s plenty of practical guidance within this approach.
We can use gates, leads, distance and thoughtfully arranged spaces to keep everyone feeling safe. We can establish predictable routines, meet needs and teach useful skills in manageable stages. We can prevent situations becoming overwhelming while helping dogs gradually build confidence and experience.
Rewards help us communicate what works and give dogs a reason to practise it again. Our job is also to notice when the task needs adjusting, or when there may be something else we need to understand.
That takes observation, planning and flexibility. It also involves supporting the person holding the lead, so they understand what we’re working towards and how it fits into everyday life.
Having space to ask questions, understand the reasoning behind advice and say when something leaves you uncomfortable is essential. Those conversations are a valuable part of working together.
For me, kind, ethical, evidence-based support means looking carefully at the dog and the person in front of me, then finding practical ways to help both.
If you’re feeling tangled up in conflicting advice, you’re welcome to get in touch for a chat.
Tara
Paws & Minds 🐾🧠