13/02/2026
This is so true.
Why do these particular basics take so long?
They don't actually take that long. I spent years seemingly having the same lesson over and over.
"Let go of the inside rein, don't pull it backward."
"Relax your leg DOWN, don't scrunch it up."
"Move your hips, don't squeeze your butt!"
These are frustrating to learn when you've spent years developing poor muscle memory of scrunching and pulling. Even when your brain wants to do something different, your body struggles to let these habits go.
On top of the frustrating and lengthy process of un-doing, comes the mental resistance: for many, thoughts that this work is below them, or not necessary to them. Some have heavy mental resistance in the form of shame, where they feel so discouraged now that they are being told they "can't ride" (which is not what is being said). The feelings that this will take so long they'll never get anywhere. Maybe even frustration or anger they haven't been taught this before. This is probably the longest part of the process - the rider sorting through all sorts of mental resistances to re-learning a feeling seat, as opposed to scrunching and pulling aids that work in opposition to the horse.
There is nothing to be ashamed of, however, because it is human nature to want to feel secure. A body scrunches when it isn't stable, and when a secure seat is not taught, and a rider in their learning is either directed to do what I call "mooshing the horse around" which is to say, sending the horse through a series of aids and movements without a seat that can accomodate these directives, or just simply forced to survive the horses movements without tools, the body learns to defend itself. This self defense feels threatening to the brain to let go of, and so it is very natural for this process to be difficult.
Learning these movements well for the first time is relatively easy. My new to riding students have an annoyingly easy time learning because they don't know these habits. For these new riders, the process can be fairly straight forward (lucky sons of guns ;) ).
So why do the basics take so long? They actually are fairly straightforward (not easy), provided there isn't much resistance. If there is resistance, don't feel bad or ashamed. I struggled deeply, floundered profusely, and filled three whole books with my frustration and angst over the process. There is nothing braver and nothing more important than leaving behind the feelings of false control of a pulling hand and scrunching seat and leg - To surrender yourself to the horse and actually learn to balance, to learn to guide and feel and actually RIDE, not just survive or boss the horse around.
It feels difficult because it actually is - that is why so many forgo this process. If it were easy, everyone would be doing it.
