18/07/2023
The arrogance of me. Thinking I could take on a six year old newly broken pony. She was all over the shop. I knew that from the very first ride but still I thought I could handle it. Thought she would settle down and become the easy plod I was looking for. Like it would happen by magic somehow. I had no experience of young ponies at all, frankly very little experience of horses or ponies, period. Just what I had gleaned working at a riding school as a teenager and caring for my son’s elderly gentle pony. This was to be a whole new level of ownership and one I had no preparation for.
It’s no wonder I completely lost my nerve and stopped riding. I could not even handle her on the ground with confidence. I suffered so many injuries from my fright and her panic at my fright. I was terrified just doing up her rug straps in case I got hurt and would sn**ch at them. Poor Rabbit, she really deserved better than that.
It’s been a brutal way to learn but I am so glad I didn’t sell Rabs on, so glad something always just stopped me short even though the advert was written, even though people told me she was dangerous, naughty. She wasn’t dangerous or naughty, she was scared, just like me. And from that sort of rock bottom the only way is up. It’s taken a long, long, time. But time is what you need. Time and admitting to yourself and others that you are out of your depth. Strip everything right back and surround yourself with understanding, supportive people and be willing to learn - a lot. Rabbit has taught me so much about ponies, especially the Highland variety - but even more about myself.
It was traumatic in the moment but I look back now and see that as one of the most rewarding periods of my life. We did it, Rabbit. We came good in the end. And our bond of trust now is just incredible 😍😍😍