Emotional Horsemanship by Lockie Phillips

25/04/2025

INNOCENCE LOST.

It started simply. Brutality arrived wearing an innocuous guise. Aggression- initially -reflected your own innocence back at you. It looked you calmly in the eye. It spoke softly. It took you by the elbow. It was a trusted mentor, teacher, instructor who told you, pointedly, that you were Too Soft With That Horse.

Which was confusing. Because at the top of the mastery chain, when you had a chance to glance at the work of the greatest horse people we know, those horse people were... soft. Doing almost nothing.

But not here. Not for you, you were told. Brutality arrived bearing gifts you didn't ask for or knew you wanted. It told you that you were confused. Not good enough. Too soft. Too feminine. Too...

A reckoning with your inner child began. The part of you that is beyond thoughts, beyond feelings, your awareness of your awareness is the part of you that is the most YOU, the part of you that nobody can touch. This most protected part of you revisited your inner child. The inner child that loved horses, and wanted to do things with horses, kindly.

You compared that inner child to the adult you, standing now in front of a figure of perceived authority with horses. And that authority was working very hard to make sure you were not confused about their message. Their confident message was that YOU were confused and confusing and that your softness could kill you with a horse.

Your inner child had no argument here. Because growing up, it's possible, you were thrown to the wolves. Sink or swim. A juvenile facing adult issues and emotional taxes you didn't owe and should never have to pay. Your upbringing was without a nurturing love, and you turned out fine. So, what this adult authority figure was telling you appears now true. Softness could kill you. Because kindness is confusing. The only thing that works in this world is some form of brutality. Some form of force field around you at all times. The only way to connect is to lead with armour on. And never hesitate to take up the sword, especially to those closest to you. So, if a horse tries getting close to you, take up the sword. This world is not built for nurturing care (they told you over and over). That is a saccharine fantasy and P.S. you will definitely be socially ridiculed if you try, which is the only absolute truth in their statement. You will be ridiculed. Look to your left, look to your right. 99% of these people are in the same boat. The boat of not knowing deep, true, foundational care. And we turned out fine. (?)

And the saddest part about this everyone, all of the above is true. This authority figure is 99% correct. With the caveat that they are correct from their perspective. Of course kindness kills if you have never known kindness nor been educated to it. Of course softness is confusing if you were raised by harshness and forced by rage in its various forms. Of course.

They are correct- from their perspective. They are not telling you anything about you. When they tell you your kindness kills you they are really telling you about themselves. And they deserve our understanding and compassion.

They are between a rock and a hard place. And they are probably complicit now as adults, in upholding the creation of that rock and the importance of the hard place.

Strip them of their Rock-Hardplace approach to horsemanship and their nervous system descends into a frenzy. They are often quick to become all nervous, and no system.

So they are correct, from their perspective.

Because kindness requires rigorous practice and education. If you were never taught that there is a difference between your body and someone else's body, you will not be able to teach that to a horse who behaviourally and emotionally bleeds into your personal space regularly... WITHOUT getting violent somehow. It won't be enough to succinctly and precisely adjust where the horse is standing, you'll need to Tug-Tug-Tug on that halter, Swing-Swing-Swing that rope, Tap-Tap-Tap with the stick and then, be sure that the horse is intimidated enough about being close to you that they are unlikely to step in again.

This is not leadership.

This is leaderless emergency handling.

This is chaos. This is a person who has never been taught precise inter-personal boundaries.

But then again, I might be totally wrong about that.

But my experiences have tracked with the above with such a ferocious accuracy that I can smell it coming before it walks into the arena.

Like feeling their energy before they come into the room, hearing their heartbeat. They do not know where their body ends and another body begins. They think they know about connection but the way they communicate to others tells another story. They attach. They morph, shape shift, bleed into and co-depend. That is not connection. And manipulation is not clear communication and nor is intimidation through a level of physical pressure that belies your belief and ability that more can and will be used for any reason at all if YOU feel threatened. Am I talking about the people or the horses now. Or both?

So, the alternative?

Educate. Educate. Educate. Make mistakes. Try again. Lay the weapons down and listen to the truth about the space around you. Do others respect it? Have you been proactive?

Have you shown others- horse and human- exactly how to behave in your vicinity? And should others make a mistake, do you address their wrong behaviour as a mistake of action, or a failure of their character?

It is not a character flaw of a horse to make an accident in their use of your personal space. So, correcting the horse like they are a bad horse tells everyone around you that it is actually YOU who lacks boundaries. Not the horse. You do not know how to not project your hurt feelings onto others. You make others accountable for your lack of decision about what happens around you. This is not something the horse needs to pay a debt on your behalf for.

And no, doing the same kind of action towards the horse and dressing it in soft language is not the kind of evolution I am here for either.

I would rather hear bald, dry language to describe true kind interpersonal intelligence, than flowery, manipulative language describing physical acts of violence of varying degrees. Some of the kindest people I know speak directly to the point, some of the meanest people I met in years past had the best, the best manners imaginable.

First, let us admit where innocence was lost. Someone, somewhere luring us away from our body and its senses.

Second, let us reclaim the truth of our bodies. Know where you are in space, breathe into your low back and occupy it without apology.

Third, say No, Thank You. To anyone who attempts to talk you out of your kindness, your love, your softness.

Fourth, educate your horses, and others, how to be around you.

That is innocence reclaimed.

23/04/2025

I need your help! I’m looking for some fresh accounts to follow. Horse people that YOU know and love, that inspire you.

But…

Share with me accounts that have a smaller audience. Preferably pages with 3 figures to their followers. Or under 5K followers.

I’m a big believer in community, but especially de-centralizing inspiration, and following big minds with new or growing platforms. I wish to encourage us to stop looking at size of platforms as a way to qualify someone. I was still the same person when I had 600 followers. I remember what it was like. I don’t like seeing the same five accounts dominating our trends and thoughts. But I need your help to find these businesses!

Priority boarding for businesses that promote an absence of or reduction in the use of bits, spurs and sticks, businesses that promote groundwork, wellness, slow training, and businesses run by women, BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, sole traders, local instructors, non-competitive, trimmers, body workers, vets… I’m open to follow pages outside these parameters of course but these pages will be sit in my love language.

What working equine pro’s do you love, that have smaller platforms. Tag below and I’m looking forward to discovering what they do and how they do it!

22/04/2025

Some of the feedback we have received the last two days since the clinic over the weekend.

Victoria is where all my friends and family live. Though Spain is firmly my home, if I am most likely to return anywhere in the world it is here.

Thank you for your feedback and for welcoming EH into your community.

I’m looking forward to returning if you’ll have me and I hope you had a great clinic.

21/04/2025

Nuance is for EVERYBODY. We deserve community too.

It will take me a while to understand what I just saw and felt at Quiet Oaks Performance Horses in Romsey this last weekend. 6 Participants and about 20 auditors stepped away from their Easter to be present together.

We had a young Brumby just beginning his ridden life, a mature Andalusian who knew exactly who she was, a New Forest Filly who was experiencing c**t starting in a way that I could sleep at night knowing she was cared for, a Standardbred whose talent and connection to his human needed careful support to not become anxiety, an Australian Stock Horse with impending health issues transitioning to an unridden life, and a homebred Thoroughbred stewarded by a highly skilled and empathic body worker, learning how all movement can be positive if you're not stuck.

So how can such a diverse range of horses and people come together for something clear, seamless and consistent?

Because we are going beyond what the horses DO for us. Into how the horses feel.

It is my highest priority. Sure, the horse has a long list of things that need to be addressed, but how does the horse feel right now, and what is the single most important step that they need- right now, and how can I make that as simple as possible.

It is so tempting to layer up complications. Got an issue, here is a THING for it. The thing might be a gimmick with the pelvis, or a wiggle of a finger, or a new tool. And though I explored our bodies, our hands and our tool use at this clinic, I must resist the urge to offer folks a quick fix. An easy solution that presents a mental economy for the person... especially if it means I would be asking the horse to continue masking, continue covering things up, continue holding the bill.

I want to release horses into the welcoming hands of their people, and have the horses feel utterly peaceful there.

It takes a lot of discipline and discernment for me to NOT reach into my tool kit sometimes, if by doing so I saddle a participant and their horse with unnecessary complication. It would be a "flex" of my skill if I did so, and I run the risk of looking empty handed to the superficial onlooker. But I don't attract many superficial onlookers. Nor do I care what they think if they attend.

I am here to do deep work. Not perform.

I am here to support the participants, centre their horses, and allow people to watch and experience what it is like to be unobtrusive, kind-hearted community member.

I am here to help us explore a journey into your horses experience of you. And not shield us from the truth of that. But hold your hand and help you breathe into it.

Then, have a fabulous time exploring gentle techniques. Techniques that won't force an Ooh and an Ahh today. But techniques that look just like your real work at home. Patient, appropriate accumulation of real change, that brings the horse into the training as an active participant... not a tool we use for clout.

Bringing a clinic to my home state felt like a homecoming. And if there is anywhere in the world that I am highly likely to clinic over and over again, it will be Victoria.

Thank you to Meagan. It would have been impossible without you.
Cathy and Pawel for your five star venue. When can I move in?

Thank you everyone who came. I am still struggling to find the words for what this meant for me personally and professionally.

21/04/2025

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Absolutely humbled and grateful to have spent the last two days in the presence of such accomplished and incredible humans, guided by Emotional Horsemanship by Lockie Phillips and hosted by Quiet Oak Performance Horses and Harrison Holistic Horsemanship.

I knew from the start that this was going to be a big weekend for me, but trusting the process was very confronting. The amazing love and support of my fellow participants and spectators alike really got me through in the end.

Lockie showed his range of expertise, guiding six horses in different stages of life and training, along with their human partners, through group sessions and tailored private lessons.

The venue was spectacular, the atmosphere amazing, and the catering fabulous.

Huge thanks to my fellow participants for providing such a supportive environment. I am in awe of all of you and the character, empathy and skill you demonstrated over the weekend.

To the hosts Meagan and Cathy for providing such a well-equipped facility and welcoming environment, and Cathy again for taking photos and videos of my lesson for me.

To my amazing little mare Ava, who has come a long way in a short time and really showed her resilience and adaptability both in the lead-up to the event and over the weekend.

To the Emotional Horsemanship admin team for the seamless organisation of the clinic and offering a payment plan, which made if possible for me to attend.

To the auditors and spectators for your respect, compassion and support.

And most of all thank you to Lockie for your patience and empathy and creating this safe space for people like us. I have heard you speak about it often, but didn't appreciate the importance of it until I was the one under the microscope.

I am forever changed. I hope to see you all again.

If anyone is interested I will link in the comments to my blog post with more details about my personal experience at the clinic.

20/04/2025

😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

20/04/2025

So grateful to be present for a day of Emotional Horsemanship by Lockie Phillips clinic at Quiet Oak Performance Horses yesterday.
Lockie is articulate, focused, kind. This is what it is to be at the centre of horse. Where our curiosity should be taking us, where our hours should be spent, where horses are given the empathy, time, space and attention required to be their most beautiful selves. The centre, not the sidelines. 🩵🙏🏻

Thanks Meagan Harrison for making it happen as only you know how.

18/04/2025

Do you need the response- right now?

One of the biggest problems in horse training today, in my opinion, is the collective urge to create response that is instant or immediate.

Point A: You ask.

Point B: The horse does.

With an absolute minimum of delay between point A to B.

There is nothing wrong with an instant response though. Where training goes pear shaped is WHAT WE DO when the horse doesn't respond instantly. There is a wide range of approaches in an instance of no immediate response. Some people panic, some people get annoyed, some people get confused. A wide variety of responses occur there.

It has been my experience that this moment, the moment of no instant response, is something we should be seeking with intense curiosity, and really celebrate. We need to lean into this moment and understand it correctly. I believe this moment is a moral fork in the road, and the decisions we make as horse people in that moment are absolutely pivotal for the quality of the outcome in the training of the horse.

Training ourselves to have high quality, high fidelity, numerous options of what to do and how to feel when the horse does not instantly respond is key to forging not just an ethical outcome, but an outcome that allows the horse to feel invested and interested in the training.

A horse that responds immediately, generally speaking, has the following things going on emotionally.

1. They understand the question very well. There is no learning present. Because they already know the answer. So they don't need thinking or processing time. They just respond because they know the answer.

2. The horse does not know the answer at all. But is held between "a rock and a hard place", if the rock is a training tool that provides pain or intimidation for the horse if they don't take action immediately and the hard place being a handler who doesn't allow them to think. So, the horse doesn't know the answer to your question, but knows that it is not permitted to simply stand and think. So they just move, often in a controlled chaotic manner, knowing that a generalised output of movement is safer than quiet consideration of their handlers question. Once moving, often their handler sculpts the response they want, like shaping raw clay. The handler just wants movement to work with. Rather than movement the horse understands before they move.

3. The horse did not hear the question or understand the question. But out of the corner of their eye, they saw their human do "something". It was not important to the horse what that "something" was. They just have a very simplistic and unsophisticated rapport in the training. Like attempting to speak a language where the only phrases you can utter are a post-verbal guttural grunt in the negative and a up-swinging groan for the affirmative. The horse has no true communication tools. But the horse knows that still feet, quiet focus, attention and rapport to their handler and mutual problem solving, is not permitted... or, they simply have never been exposed to still feet, quiet focus, attention and rapport to the handler. So they don't even know it is a thing. So their handler does "something" who knows what. And the horse just stays in a state of hyper-vigilant action with no clear direction. Often labelled as pushy, even aggressive. These horses have no tools and no structure to obtain tools. If their handler does not know what to do here, the handler can often feel unsafe, even if they are experienced. And then deploy techniques and tools that create a bubble around their body, a bubble where the horse is not permitted and if they burst that bubble, there is some form of punishment, sometimes benign, sometimes not. So the horse is not listening, doesn't know how to listen, doesn't understand how to communicate to people. But understands that stillness is unsafe and so is being too close to their handler. The horse is now alone, in break down, and often volatile and dangerous.

Number 3 is the most comment state I find horses in.

I wish that was not the truth.

Number 2 is the second most common place I find horses in.

Number 1 is the least common place I find horses in. But if I do find them there, the horse is often plateauing. Because there is no true learning. Just mechanical response of already known tasks. Often this is touted as superior, because many people believe that confusion is a grave mistake with a horse.

Confusion, momentary confusion, is an aspect of learning. Learning is the ability to answer questions you do not know the answer to, when you start trying to answer.

Of course, these 3 categories are dumbed down for social media and I find a whole host of other variations in horses too. With my tongue in my cheek I roughly call this "Emotional Biomechanics", not because I need any help infuriating the Biomechanics police, but because your horses emotional state in training has a shape, a pattern and a predictable function to it. And we best learn to recognise it.

So, no matter what the shape of the horses emotional biomechanics is when I meet them, my goal is to try and bring them to the following state, or some version of the following state augmented for them as individuals.

1. The horse is balanced in their mind and emotional state, so that when a question is asked of them, they are easily able to bring their focus to their handler. If they do not already know the answer, they are confident that their handler will give them time to think, and if necessary, that their handler will explain the question as many times as necessary -without escalating or getting louder or putting more pressure- but will explain the question as many times as necessary for the horse to understand the question. Then, once they understand the question, the horse is given the dignity to begin preparing a response. This may require multiple shifts and adjustments to their balance, posture and weight first, before they actually move their feet. They are confident that as they begin to prepare a response, their handler won't panic, abandon the question before the response launches, or rush them to get ready faster. Then, when they take action on the response the horse is able to be really honest with the quality of the response and the capacity of their body in the response at that time. Know that they won't be descended upon like a flock of chickens at fresh grain and pecked at with corrections until they are shaped to the humans liking. But they are able to offer their ideas, their true position, their true response, and be confident that their human will accept it, believe it, and be grateful for it. Once a response is consolidated, they have a chance to observe their handler mark and reinforce the response in a gentle way that doesn't annoy or cause manic fixation or addiction. And their handler takes in the horses honest response as good information, and adjusts the next question to optimise the horses next response.

In my experience, the above written experience is something that can occur in about 3-30 seconds, depending on the horse, when the relationship between the horse and their handler is secure.

And it is what I have dedicated my life to showing horses and people all over the world, how to do. And tools you can learn to achieve it.

17/04/2025

“Be the change you wish to see in the world”

It’s one of the codes I live by as much as possible, and something I admire in others who do the same. Speaking about those changes on public forums or in large groups, however, is something I have always struggled with, and largely avoided.

Although I have always been happy and open about having hard, confronting and honest conversations in person about my own beliefs around horses and challenging the “norms” of the horse world, I am the biggest self-professed coward when it comes to saying anything in the online space. Mostly because I am not a big user of social media in general, and because I don’t have the energy or want to enter into any online debates or battles. But, if I’m being honest, it’s also largely because of fear. Fear of abuse, ridicule and even of offending too many people.

I’ve spent a lifetime making myself small, being “nice” and unthreatening - making people feel comfortable around me. It’s conditioned into a lot of us from a young age and a hard habit to break. It’s also frustrating and limiting, for me but also for the impact I could have by speaking out about the things I believe in and the changes I think need to happen. It’s also not helpful to the horses I want to advocate for.

It’s something I’ve been thinking about more and more lately and after recently attending Emotional Horsemanship by Lockie Phillips clinic in Kudla something that became clearer and clearer to me - it’s time to step up and speak out. There are people listening, people asking the same questions, thinking the same things and people who need to see other people out there taking a stand - even if it’s just to stand next to them while they speak.

I had a wonderful conversation with Eilse from Trusted Touch Equine Body Work & Horsemanship at the end of that clinic about finding and using our voices, despite the abuse, the ridicule and the inevitable tears it brings us, and I am incredibly grateful to her and to Lockie for showing me that despite all of that, it’s still worth being brave and speaking our truth. If not for ourselves, then for the horses.

Photo credit: Natural Flow Body, Mind & Soul

17/04/2025

Alternatives to Arm Extenders, Sticks and Whips.

At a clinic recently, an attendee asked a really beautiful and seriously important question. They asked it kindly, respectfully, thoughtfully and intelligently. I believe these sorts of questions are the questions we need to be asking ourselves and each other.

The question was about my stance on whips. Out of all the things I teach in regards to horses, I naively thought my stance on whips would fly under the radar and barely be a blip on the radar. It turned out my stance on whips ruffled feathers. I came to understand, that whips, sticks and arm extenders are deeply embedded in our relationship with horses. And deeply embedded in our concept of who we are with horses. I remembered the times I was taught to use them, and what needed to happen inside my mind and body, in order to drop the stick and remain effective and safe. I also acknowledge that many people who may be drawn to my work, will be drawn in bearing sticks without concern. And it may have been confusing, or even embarrassing, to realise that I may not support that choice.

So, I was asked this beautiful question. I remember about 80% of what I said, verbatim. I am sharing it here, in gratitude of our attendee who asked.

"But... what's wrong with sticks? And how can we train things like collection and lateral work without them?"

My answer, to the best of my memory.

"Firstly, we get to choose. We have a choice. We first need to decide for ourselves the following; do we want to use the stick, or not? That's the first step".

We then discussed in the group those among us who have decided -generally- not to use them. And those among us who -generally- have decided not to. Knowing that this decision allows for nuance, where there can always be exceptions to the rule we decided for ourselves. After this I continued.

"So, if you want to use the stick. Use it. I am not here to change you if you do not want to. You get to choose. I used sticks for a long time, in different ways and in different disciplines. So, if you want to use it, use it."

Surprised pause from the group.

"Certain things are easier to train with a stick. You and your horse won't have to think extra hard about how to create detailed and difficult manoeuvres involving connections of draw, yield and hold through space and spatial geometry. You can just pick up a stick, and touch the body part your training, no matter where you are standing next to the horse."

Calm nodding from the group.

"You and your horse will need to be super concentrated to train lateral work without arm extenders. You will need to teach yourself and your horse to put in an extra show of mental effort and concentration, in order to train certain things free from sticks. For some horses, that effort is difficult on them. But you have seen my clinic so far, you can see how much effort and support I offer to the horses in helping them learn that soft skill of concentration. But I personally happen to really enjoy a very concentrated horse. I don't ride horses to check out. I work with horses to check in. I am not looking for mental economy. Then, once you have that feel with a horse, lateral work is a collection of yields, draws, holds and lifts that you have developed first one at a time, and consolidate them, then begin to layer them in increasingly complex combinations and conjunctions. It is difficult. It is time consuming. It is a process I find a lot of fun."
"But you do not need a stick to train lateral work. You can train lateral work without the stick. It is harder to train these things without the stick..."

Vigorous nodding from some in the group...

"But I personally, happen to really enjoy that challenge. It is not an unfair stretch of imagination to say, that standard practice worldwide, is that a stick will be shown to a horse, at some point in their life, in a manner that frightens or hurts a horse. Horses remember. And unless you have raised that horse yourself, if your horse has been in the world, the likelihood that they have been exposed to a stick that hurt or frightened them, is high. So, the damage is done."

Confused pause in the group.

"When you hold a stick, and move it, the end of the stick is always moving faster with your hand. Because of leverage. The end of that stick, be it fibreglass, a bamboo, a cherry tree, moves faster than our hand. It is extremely easy with these tools to STING a horse, even by accident. Unless you bring the stick into contact with the horse with absolutely no dynamic movement, and slowly bring the stick down smoothly and with control..."

I begin simulating what I mean with my hand...

"But if you move the stick from your wrist, even a tiny movement, causes the end of the stick to move faster than your hand, and the likelihood that the end of it will sting a thin skinned animal... is high."

Taking a breath. In my mind, I now have to push down my own internal discretion. These are things I have kept inside for a long time, black eggs I have sat on silently, because I know what I will say next is the truth from my perspective, but a dangerous and irritating truth to others. And I know that if I speak it, I am likely to lose people. And I like people. So the next bit is hard to say. So I say it.

"It can look really elegant. It doesn't often look brutal. And unless you're watching carefully, you will miss it. A flick of the wrist, the horses eyes widen, and suddenly their body very quietly, jumps to action. I am personally, no longer impressed with any training that happens next. If that horse was driven into movement or response through a sting, a memory of a sting, or the presence of a potential sting. I am no longer impressed by the training that happens next. Of course, it is possible to rehab the stick, I have rehabbed horses to sticks in the past. It is possible that your horse knows you won't hurt them. But if that horse was hurt even ONE TIME, by a stick in their life, it is now a tool I prefer not to use. Because the damage is done. And they remember."

Day two of this clinic, towards the end, we began asking a horse and rider team for the first steps of lateral work under saddle. Travers. Shoulder-in. Counter shoulder-in. Renvers. Even a few steps of a western half-pass just for diversity.

A stick was not present. This was with a horse who was not afraid to intimidate with ear pinning, tail swishing, nipping if her handling was a problem in her estimation.

Would it have been easier to use it. Yes.

But easier for whom?

And is easier work, the world we want for horses?