08/07/2025
Say hello to Sam! He isn’t a dog, he is a king, possibly even a deity. He isn’t looking for a family to become a calm, collected companion to. He is looking for disciples, or possibly indentured servants. Ideally they will worship him all the days of his life, shower him with their undivided attention, sing his praises to anyone who will listen and be at his beck and call for belly rubs and kisses. If you’ve been yearning to be ruled by a small, albeit extremely cute and floofy, four legged tyrant, and you just can’t wait to be screamed at when you don’t give him your full and undivided attention, fill out your application today to become Sam’s devoted acolyte! He promises to be a fair and just ruler so long as you don’t forget your place and always give him cuddles when he demands them.