06/17/2025
Someone wonderful go adopt this guy!
RESIGNATION LETTER
From: Bronte
To: The Humans Who Keep Saying “You’ll Get Adopted Soon”
After months of smiling for the camera, tolerating loud puppies, and being described as “such a good boy” with no follow-through, I hereby resign from adoptable dog status.
I am 3 years old. 50 pounds. Handsome in a brooding, non-needy way. I like girl dogs best, mind my business, and have never once eaten anyone’s Crocs.
Despite this, I remain tragically unadopted. I’ve watched louder, messier, wetter dogs leave before me. Some didn’t even sit on command. I sit so well.
Please forward all future meet-and-greet requests to literally any other dog who enjoys being rejected.
Effective immediately, I will be moving into a state of quiet retirement, where I no longer get my hopes up or wag my tail for strangers.
Best of luck with your continued search for “the right dog.”
– Bronte
STAFF RESPONSE
To: Bronte
From: Literally All of Us
No.
You may not resign.
You’re too good, and we are far too emotionally invested in this saga. You will sit for the camera again. You will tolerate our desperate captions. You will be adopted, even if we have to walk around town with a sandwich board that says “ASK ME ABOUT BRONTE.”
So get comfy, but not too comfy.
We’re not giving up.
– BCHS STAFF and Volunteers.
📲 bchsohio.org/adoption-application
