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RiRi's Ranch, Little Mountain, SC (2026)

09/03/2026

My happy place 🐓🐐🌻❤️

09/02/2026

🌻 Thoughtful Wednesday from Maddie 💕🐐

Wellllll… guess who’s HOME?!?
MOM AND DAD ARE HOME FROM VACAY!!!
And let me just say… YAYYYYYYY!

Granny did an AMAZING job while they were gone. She gave us lots of love, lots of attention, and—most importantly—LOTS OF TREATS.
I think she may have been trying to make sure Mom couldn’t replace her.

And NOPE… Mom did NOT come home with any new animals this time!
(We were watching that suitcase pretty closely, just in case.

BUT… while Mom and Dad were away, something very special happened here at the ranch.

We had our FIRST BABY KEET HATCH! 🐣💛

She came a little earlier than her friends, so she arrived before Mom and Dad got home. And oh my goodness… she was TINY, fluffy, precious and absolutely adorable.

We were ALL so excited because this was a first for us. And Granny?
Well… Granny fell in love immediately. ❤️

But farm life has a way of teaching us that along with the happy moments come some heartbreaking ones too.

Our little girl was a fighter. She tried SO hard to become one of the gang. She wanted to be part of everything and spent all day trying to keep up and find her place.

But sometimes, despite how hard we try and how much we love them, things just aren’t meant to be.

She wasn’t quite ready to make her entrance into this big farm world, and she eventually joined a few of our other little friends in Heaven. 🌈🐣

And while our hearts are sad, there is something I want everyone to remember…

She was loved.
She was cared for.
She was held.
She was watched over.
And for the short little time she was here, she mattered. ❤️

That’s one of the things farm life teaches us, friends…

Sometimes we celebrate new life with the biggest smiles, and sometimes we say goodbye with tears in our eyes. But every little life that passes through our hands leaves a little piece of love behind. 🌻

So today, I’m choosing to be thankful for the tiny, fluffy little girl who gave us a first we will never forget.

Fly high, sweet baby.
You were here for only a little while…
but you were loved a whole LOT. ❤️

With love,
Maddie 🐐💕

09/01/2026

🐐💅 THE REAL GOATS OF RIRI’S RANCH — TUESDAY EDITION 🐐

Well, well, well… LOOK WHO IS COMING HOME! 👀

Mom & Dad will be back soon, and I have mixed feelings. 😏

On one hoof… I MISS MY DAD & MOM! ❤️
The head scratches.
The snuggles.
The treats.
The ridiculous amount of attention I clearly deserve.

On the other hoof… Granny has been doing a FANTASTIC job! 👏🐐

She has kept everybody fed, watered, happy and accounted for, so I’m thinking maybe we should keep her around permanently. 🤔

Just kidding, Mom. 😂
Please come home. I have a few things to discuss with you… including my treat inventory. 🧐

BUT HERE’S THE BIG QUESTION…

🐐 WILL MOM COME HOME WITH ANY LIVE ANIMALS THIS TIME??? 🐐

Because apparently Mom has a history of coming home from adventures with surprises. 😳

I’m watching that suitcase VERY closely.

If I see feathers…
🐥 SUSPICIOUS.

If I see fur…
🐐 EXTREMELY SUSPICIOUS.

If I see a tail…
🚨 EVERYBODY PANIC.

Now, while Mom and Dad have been away, let me explain what ducks actually do all day.

🦆 A DUCK’S DAILY SCHEDULE

6:00 AM — Quack.

6:05 AM — Eat.

6:07 AM — Get in the water.

6:09 AM — Get out of the water.

6:10 AM — Shake water EVERYWHERE.

6:15 AM — Eat again.

7:00 AM — Walk around looking like they have somewhere important to be.

7:02 AM — Forget where they were going.

8:00 AM — Quack about it.

9:00 AM — Nap.

10:00 AM — Splash in something they absolutely should NOT be splashing in.

11:00 AM — Eat.

12:00 PM — More quacking.

1:00 PM — Investigate a suspicious leaf.

1:03 PM — Decide the leaf is delicious.

2:00 PM — Nap again.

3:00 PM — Quack.

4:00 PM — Eat.

5:00 PM — Make a giant mess.

6:00 PM — Pretend they had nothing to do with it.

7:00 PM — QUACKING MEETING. 🦆🦆🦆🦆

And apparently… if all goes according to plan…

🥚 THERE COULD BE 15 MORE DUCKS IN ABOUT TWO WEEKS!!! 🐣🦆

FIFTEEN.

As the official head of security around here, I feel like someone should have asked my permission. 😳

At this rate, RiRi’s Ranch is going to need a DUCK DEPARTMENT.

Mom comes home today..
I’ll be waiting.

With questions.

And possibly a search warrant for her luggage. 😂

👇 DO YOU THINK MOM IS COMING HOME WITH A NEW LIVE ANIMAL?

Love,
🐐 Maddie

08/31/2026

🐐🎬 THE REAL GOATS OF RiRi’s RANCH

Episode: “Things Mom Swore She’d NEVER Do”

🎤 Previously on The Real Goats of RiRi’s Ranch…

Mom had a plan.

She was going to enjoy retirement.
She was going to relax.
She was going to wear cute clothes.
She was going to keep her car and house relatively animal-free.

🤣🤣🤣

CUT TO PRESENT DAY…

Mom is standing in the pasture wearing muddy boots, shorts, a shirt covered in hay, and carrying a bucket of something she probably doesn’t want to explain.

And honestly?

We barely recognize her anymore.

Because Mom once said she would NEVER…

👢 Wear farm boots with shorts.
Now she considers this a complete outfit.

💩 Get dirty every single day.
Now she just looks down, says “Oh well,” and keeps going.

🐐 Let animals take over her schedule.
HAHAHAHAHA… Mom doesn’t HAVE a schedule anymore.

WE HAVE A SCHEDULE.
MOM JUST FOLLOWS IT.

🚗 Have animals in her car.
Yet somehow, this is considered transportation.

🏠 Have animals in the house.
Apparently “Come inside” now applies to goats, chickens, dogs… and whoever else manages to sneak through the door.

☕ Drink cold coffee.
Because apparently every time Mom sits down, someone screams.

📱 Stop what she’s doing because an animal needs her.
Mom could be on the phone, eating dinner, taking a shower or halfway out the door…

“MOOOOOMMMMM!”

And she’s gone. 😂

🛒 Spend more money on animals than herself.

Mom: “I don’t need anything.”

Also Mom:
“Look what I found for the goats!”

🤦‍♀️

👀 Know every animal’s personality.

She knows who is naughty.
Who is dramatic.
Who is hungry.
Who escaped.
Who started the fight.

And somehow…

she knows who did it before she even sees the evidence.

But the biggest thing Mom NEVER thought she’d do?

❤️ Fall completely, hopelessly, ridiculously in love with a bunch of animals.

She thought she was starting a little ranch.

Instead…

THE ANIMALS STARTED RUNNING HER LIFE.

And I would just like to say…

You’re welcome, Mom. 🐐😌

Because without us, you’d probably be wearing clean clothes, driving a clean car, drinking hot coffee and wondering what to do with all your free time.

BORING. 😂

Welcome to RiRi’s Ranch, Mom.

There is no retirement here.

There is only…

🐐 FEED.
🐔 FARM DRAMA.
🥚 EGGS.
💩 P**P.
❤️ LOVE.
…and occasionally 911-level goat nonsense.

🎬 Tune in next time for another episode of…

THE REAL GOATS OF RiRi’s RANCH

Where Mom thought she was the boss.

Bless her heart. 😂🐐❤️

👇 CONFESSION TIME:
What’s something you NEVER thought you’d do… until life took you in a completely different direction?

08/30/2026

🐐 THE REAL GOATS OF RIRI’S RANCH 🐐🌴
Beachside Edition — by Maddie

Ummm… excuse me, Mom and Dad. 👀

We need to talk.

I have noticed that you two seem to be VERY interested in going to the beach lately. 🌊☀️

And it got me thinking…

What would a BEACH-SIDE RiRi’s Ranch actually look like? 🤔

Would we goats get little beach chairs? 🪑
Would our hay be served with a side of ocean view? 🌾🌊
Would I have to wear sunscreen on my nose? 🧴😂
And most importantly…

WHO IS GOING TO BRING ME MY TREATS WHILE YOU TWO ARE FLOATING AROUND IN THE WATER?! 😳

I can already picture it:

🏝️ RiRi’s Beach Ranch
🐐 Goats instead of beach bums
🐓 Chickens doing their best impression of seagulls
🦆 Ducks finally having a legitimate reason to be near water
🐔 Guinea hens screaming because somebody stole their beach towel
🌾 Hay blowing down the beach
🥕 Carrots instead of coconuts
🍪 Vanilla wafers served at happy hour

And ME?

👑 MADDIE — Director of Beach Operations & Snack Management.

Of course, I would need my own cabana.

Preferably with a fan.

And a snack bar.

And Mom.

Because let’s be honest… Mom thinks SHE is going to the beach to relax.

😂😂😂

Mom, honey… you have goats.

You don’t retire from goat duty. You just relocate the goat duty to the beach. 🐐🌴

And Dad?

Well, Dad can be in charge of the treats.

Obviously.

But I do have ONE serious question…

If Mom and Dad love the beach THIS much…

Are we building a beach house for the ranch, or do I need to start looking for oceanfront property myself?! 🏖️🐐

Because I already have my bags packed.

Well…

I have my hay.

Same thing. 😂

❤️🐐
Love, Maddie
Future owner of Maddie’s Oceanfront Goat Resort & Spa

08/29/2026

🐐🚨 MADDIE’S SATURDAY INVESTIGATIVE REPORT 🚨🐐
The Real Goats of RiRi’s Ranch

Okay friends… I need everyone to remain calm.

Because I have QUESTIONS. 👀

Mom has been talking about going to the BEACH again.

And now I’m hearing that DAD MIGHT BE GOING TOO. 😳🌴

Ummm… EXCUSE ME?!

Did everyone forget what happened the LAST TIME Mom and Dad left the ranch together?! 🚨🐐

Because I certainly haven’t.

That little getaway turned into a full-blown 911 situation around here!

So naturally, I have some questions:

❓ Who exactly approved Mom and Dad leaving together?

❓ Who is going to supervise the herd if something goes sideways?

❓ Who is going to monitor Presley and the rest of the escape committee?

❓ Who is going to make sure nobody discovers another hole in the fence?

❓ WHO is going to keep an eye on the GUINEAS?! Because those girls are already suspicious enough. 😂

❓ And most importantly…

WHO IS GOING TO GIVE MADDIE HER TREATS?! 🥕😳

I would also like to know why Mom keeps saying she’s retired when she seems to have a suspicious number of plans that involve leaving the ranch. 🤔

First Alaska.

Now the beach.

What’s next, Mom? A world tour?!

And Dad… buddy… I need to talk to you privately. 😂

You remember the last time you two left together, right?

Because I do.

And I’m just saying…

I’M NOT SURE THIS RANCH IS READY FOR A SEQUEL. 🚨🐐

Therefore, effective immediately, I am reopening the position of:

👮‍♀️ HEAD OF RANCH SECURITY

Oh wait…

THAT’S ME. 💅🏻🐐

So Mom and Dad, if you insist on going to the beach…

Please leave detailed instructions.

Emergency contacts.

Treat schedule.

Hay schedule.

Escape prevention plan.

And preferably…

A beachside Wi-Fi connection so I can conduct surveillance. 😂📱🌴

Because I may be a little goat…

…but I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN MY PEOPLE LEAVE TOGETHER. 👀

Happy Saturday from the goat who apparently has to keep this entire family organized. 💕🐐

Love,
Maddie
Head of Security • Treat Inspector • Chief Investigator • Survivor of The Last 911 Incident 🚨💋

08/28/2026

🐐 THE REAL GOATS OF RiRi’s RANCH 🐐💎

TGIF: A Day in the Life of Maddie

🎬 Previously on The Real Goats of RiRi’s Ranch…

People keep asking, “Maddie, what do you actually DO all day?”

Excuse me?! 😳

I am a very important member of management.

💅 Morning:
I inspect breakfast.
I inspect the hay.
I inspect Mom.
I make sure Dad has the treats.

👀 Midday:
I patrol the property for suspicious activity. After Presley’s jailbreak, I take my security duties VERY seriously.

💎 Afternoon:
I supervise the herd, monitor Mom’s whereabouts and make sure nobody is receiving more attention than ME.

🍪 Snack time:
I remind Mom that good employees deserve compensation.

😴 Rest period:
I take a strategic nap because leadership is exhausting.

🐐 Evening:
Final fence inspection.
Final herd count.
Final snack inspection.

And if everything checks out?

I go to bed knowing I personally kept this ranch running.

Do I get paid?

Absolutely not.

Do I get enough treats?

Also absolutely not. 🙄

But I continue to show up every day because someone around here has to be cute, sassy AND in charge. 💋🐐

So Happy Friday from your favorite ranch diva!

Now… WHO PUT MY NAME ON THE WEEKEND CHORE LIST?! 😳😂

Love,
💎 Maddie — Head of Everything 💎

08/27/2026

Thursday at RiRi’s Ranch — Maddie’s Investigation 🐐🔎

THURSDAY THOUGHTS FROM MADDIE…

Well, well, WELL… 👀

Mom has casually mentioned something about an upcoming BEACH TRIP. 🏖️🌊

Now, I’m a little confused.

I was under the impression Mom was RETIRED.
Retired means she is supposed to be right here at my beck and call, correct?

Apparently not. 🙄

Because lately, she’s been suspiciously LEAVING IN THE MORNING AND COMING HOME IN THE AFTERNOON.

Ummmm… excuse me?! 🤨

That sounds an awful lot like the old days when she used to leave and come back with stories about Jaxx and Ellie.

I’m not saying she’s up to something…

I’m just saying I HAVE QUESTIONS. 🕵️‍♀️🐐

And now she’s talking about going to the BEACH?!

Who approved this retirement plan? Because clearly nobody consulted Head of Security Maddie.

Meanwhile, we have a MUCH more important situation happening right here at the ranch…

GWEN THE GUINEA HEN. 🐔👀

Gwen has been sitting on what appears to be an ENTIRE MOUNTAIN OF EGGS for days.

So naturally, the ranch is now on BABY WATCH. 🥚🥚🥚

Will Gwen have babies soon?

Will she actually hatch them?

Will Mom have to start counting tiny guinea keets?

Or has Gwen simply decided that sitting on a mountain of eggs is her new full-time job?

Honestly… I respect the commitment. 😂

So today’s questions are:

🏖️ Where is Mom really going?
🐐 Who is watching the ranch while she’s gone?
🥚 Will Gwen give us babies?
👀 And most importantly… WHY WAS I NOT CONSULTED?!

Stay tuned, friends.

Maddie is watching.
Maddie is suspicious.
And Maddie wants answers. 😂🐐💕

08/26/2026

Wednesday Wisdom from Maddie 🐐💕🎶

Well friends… today I’m feeling a little extra thoughtful.

Mom told me that Dolly Parton has passed away, and while I may be just a little goat on a little ranch, even I know that the world lost someone very special. 💔

Dolly wasn’t just a singer. She was a storyteller, a dreamer, a hard worker, and someone who seemed to have a little sunshine tucked inside her heart.

And around here… we’re going to miss her. ❤️

But Mom says that’s the beautiful thing about music.

The person may leave us, but the music never does. 🎶

So today, I’m putting on my imaginary rhinestone cowgirl hat and dedicating one of my favorite Dolly songs to the ranch:

🎶 “9 to 5” 🎶

Because between you and me… I understand the struggle. 😂

I work ALL day supervising this herd!

I inspect the hay.
I taste-test the treats.
I keep Dad in line.
I monitor Mom’s activities.
I patrol the property.
And I maintain Farm Security… which, as you all know, is a VERY demanding position. 👀🐐

And yet somehow… I still haven’t received a paycheck. 🤨

But Dolly taught us something bigger than working hard.

She taught us to dream big, stay humble, be kind, laugh often, and never be afraid to be exactly who we are.

So today, I’m going to raise my little goat head high and say:

Thank you, Dolly. 💕
Thank you for the songs.
Thank you for the laughter.
Thank you for the memories.
Thank you for making generations of people smile.

You may be gone from this world, but your music will keep playing, your stories will keep being told, and your beautiful spirit will keep shining through every song. 🌟🎶

And if you hear a little goat singing along somewhere…

That’s probably me. 🐐😂💕

Rest peacefully, Dolly.
You will be missed… but your music will live on forever. ❤️🎶

Love,
Maddie 🐐💕
Head of Security, Treat Inspector & Part-Time Country Music Critic

08/25/2026

🐐 TUESDAY UPDATE — BY MADDIE, HEAD OF SECURITY

Welllllll, somebody must have counted yesterday’s votes for MORE GOODIES ON THE RANCH because THIS MORNING…

THE BIGGEST, MOST BEAUTIFUL HAY DELIVERY EVER ARRIVED!

And let me tell you something…
IT SMELLS AMAZING.
IT TASTES AMAZING.
I APPROVE.

I’m pretty sure Mom saw all those votes yesterday and said, “The people have spoken.” 😂

But then things got a little concerning around here…

I was minding my own business, enjoying my hay, when I CLEARLY heard Mom fall and hurt herself.

Now, as Head of Security, I immediately wanted to get to her…

BUT I COULDN’T.
A goat can only do so much when the humans put up fences and gates everywhere!

Thankfully, Dad finally came to the rescue.

Except…

Apparently Dad’s ears may need a little tune-up.

Because Mom was squealing in pain…

…and Dad apparently thought it was the ducks quacking.

SIR.

I love the ducks, but I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE between:

🦆 “QUACK QUACK!”

and

"OWWWWW!”

Dad eventually figured it out and helped Mom, so I suppose he gets partial credit for the rescue.

But I am officially recommending an ear examination for Dad.

And maybe a refresher course in Farm Emergency Sounds 101.

Meanwhile, I’ll be over here conducting a very thorough quality inspection of this magnificent hay delivery.

Someone has to make sure Mom’s money is being spent wisely.

Tuesday Ranch Report:
🌾 Hay — APPROVED
👩 Mom — NEEDS CHECKING ON
👨 Dad’s ears — UNDER INVESTIGATION
🦆 Ducks — FALSELY ACCUSED
🐐 Maddie — STILL IN CHARGE

Until tomorrow…

Maddie
Head of Security, Official Hay Inspector & Senior Ranch Supervisor 🐐

RiRi's Ranch

09/03/2026

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08/31/2026

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