12/16/2025
This right here…
How in the world can a dog be both sensitive and insecure, but also feel like Queen of the castle — entitled, ignores demands, growls and nips, resource guards, and tries to control their surroundings with barking, lunging, and even biting!
Because underneath that “tough” exterior lies a scared, nervous, overly anxious dog desperate for leadership, believable structure, and predictability within its family unit.
Bullying mentality forms out of lack of confidence and a sense of paranoia. Couple this with the desperate need for order, and you will experience hyper-defensiveness or over-protection. Bullies misread the intentions of others, often imputing hostility in neutral situations. Lashing out as a defense mechanism, bullies often seek ‘weaker’ victims to bolster their own sense of superiority and control.
This lack of confidence can also foster a desperate need to take control when no one else seems to be doing it themselves. Dogs void of structure and rules may lash out and assert their dominance over others as a means of coping and relieving stress.
Unpredictability, and a lifestyle void of rules, will leave an insecure dog feeling vulnerable. With the only utility they possess, dogs will use aggressive behavior in an effort to protect themselves.
The first step in transforming a bullying mindset is by addressing any and all demanding behavior (blasting out of crates, barreling through doorways, barking, growling, nipping, biting), by making it completely unacceptable. It’s OUR JOB is to let the unhealthy dog know that reactivity DOES NOT WORK, and is an intolerable, non-negotiable offense.
The hard work comes from the dedication to making changes within the family that aren’t always easy to do. Providing a reliable routine with rigid structure, clear boundaries, and accountability for breaking any household rules, will help the insecure to trust without having to threaten for results. When the human steps in to control the environment, the bully starts to reconsider having to manipulate the situation themselves.
