11/05/2026
Mothering and 麻煩 (ma fan)
I was telling ZH ma fan may be the most often used phrase in the Chinese language. Parents telling their kids not to create ma fan. Ma fan is also a common reason given when asked why not to do something. Meaning of 麻煩 is similar to inconvenience. There is a similar term in Japanese too— 面倒臭い (mendōkusai)
Growing up, my mother told us not to be ma fan. However, she was the one who got us animals, organised overseas trips/outings and gave birth to us. Birthing us and having us as dependants were ultimate ma fan.
My mom took on more ma fan projects from us in the last few years, such as housing 2 paraplegic cats, overseeing renovation work at fur folks home, housing a rabbit because I asked for help and making us stilt pants. I think she realised she couldn’t avoid ma fan from us and decided to just embrace it.
This is a strange mother’s day post but what I want to say is we should all be more like mothers. Mothers confront ma fan by solving them. Life is made up of clusters of ma fan. You can avoid ma fan and live quietly in isolation or take on ma fan as it arrives and make new friends along the way.
(Picture: part of team .folks.home making kimchi to celebrate 9 years of .sg )