ABC Dogs NZ

ABC Dogs NZ ABC Dogs NZ. All Behaviour is Communication. Sharing insights on reactivity, body language, and relationship-based learning. Based in New Zealand.
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Why wait for it?You know the trigger is there.You know your dog has seen it.And yet many people wait.They wait for the f...
01/06/2026

Why wait for it?
You know the trigger is there.
You know your dog has seen it.

And yet many people wait.
They wait for the fixation to start.
They’ll wait for the muscle tension.

Waiting for that extreme arousal and excitement.

Why? Because hope is involved.

Maybe this will be the time they don't escalate.🤞
Maybe this will be the walk where everything finally falls into place.

But if we're honest, most people already know where it's heading.

➡️What if the biggest opportunity to influence that outcome was earlier than that?
At the point your dog JUST noticed the trigger.

Before emotions begin to escalate.

What if you didn’t have to wait?

Maybe, just maybe try and reward that very first glance.

And yes, you'll likely need enough distance to make that possible.

Because the goal isn't to wait for emotions to build.
So why wait for it?

"All good ☺️They're not growling"Hang on. Some dogs can and do growl in play.It can be completely normal. "So how can I ...
31/05/2026

"All good ☺️They're not growling"
Hang on.
Some dogs can and do growl in play.
It can be completely normal.

"So how can I tell"?
It can be tricky to tell the difference between healthy play and those interactions that are something else entirely.
There are some areas we can look at to help us decipher.

➡️Immediate posture changes/rigidity/stillness

Some dogs pause, go still and then explode with loose and wiggly movements. That’s often play.
The problematic kind of rigidness is different.
It can linger for longer.
Even when the other dog is showing everyway they can "all's good here".
That stillness and posture is "tight".

It can come with hard stares, leaning or standing over.
Stiff body posture from either dog, even the one on the ground.

That’s not play

➡️When high energy switches to frantic.

Chasing and being chased. Some dogs love this.
There can be an energy change with chasing that we need to watch for though.
It can turn.
It can become far more frantic and direct.

If one dog is always the chaser, and when they catch the other, the tone changes, the body language tightens, the movements escalate and it stops looking mutual?
That’s when caution is needed.

We don't want to stop dogs playing but we do need to recognise when it's no longer fun for all dogs involved.

Some people are holding onto their dogs by a thread.And we're arguing about blueberries.Now isn't the time to shame peop...
30/05/2026

Some people are holding onto their dogs by a thread.
And we're arguing about blueberries.

Now isn't the time to shame people for feeding their dog the only way they financially can.

If some rice needs to be added to bulk a meal out because there simply isn't enough food, then that's where some people are right now.

A perfect raw diet served in a beautiful bowl with blackberries, green-lipped mussels and salmon oil might look great on social media.

But for some people, it feels like a slap in the face, over and over again.

They don't know you're already skipping meals yourself.

They’ve no idea you're juggling rent, power, groceries, fuel and a dozen other bills while trying to keep your dog fed too.

Being told "if you cared, you'd find a way" is SO easy when you're not the one standing in the supermarket trying to figure out how on earth you can get the whole family fed for the week when your bank app says seventeen dollars.

Let's be real.

People are surrendering their dogs because they can no longer afford to keep them.

Others are doing everything they can not to.

They're behind on the mortgage.
Behind on the rent.
Putting off things they really need.
Living in cold houses because the power bill has become yet another thing to worry about.
Answering the phone?
Well, you don’t really do that anymore because you know it’s someone wanting money that you just don't have.

And through all of this.
Day in and day out.
People are trying to keep their dog.

Because their dog is family.

Their dog that sleeps on their bed, snuggles and snores.
Their dog that got them through the divorce.
Their dog that sat beside them when life just fell apart.

Their dog was there in those moments when nobody else was.

People are clawing and scraping to hold onto that relationship.

And while they're doing everything they can to keep their dog in their home, they're being told they aren't good enough because they just can't afford someone else's version of the perfect diet.

Perspective matters.
Of course nutrition matters.
And yup, we should feed the best diet we reasonably can.

But right now.
In these economic times.
A dog eating a less-than-perfect diet in a loving home is often in a far, far better position than a dog that loses that home altogether.

And for many families, that's not a hypothetical.
That's the very decision they're trying desperately not to make.

What if your dog is already trying to communicate?Just not in a way most people recognise.Heard of whale eye before?Exce...
29/05/2026

What if your dog is already trying to communicate?
Just not in a way most people recognise.

Heard of whale eye before?
Excellent if you have.

But we need to be careful that it isn't misread simply because a dog is looking sideways.
Same, same, but different.

Whale eye tends to involve more than just the visible white. There’s often tension too.

Tighter skin.
Tighter muscles.
Wider looking eyes.

Dilated pupils are another tricky one.

Not all dilated pupils are negative.

Have you ever played a game your dog loved or watched them lock onto a ball you're about to throw?

Those glossy dark circles can literally expand in front of your eyes.
Pretty cool to see.

On the other hand, if you've ever been faced with a dog that is about to tell someone to "back off", you may recognise that exact same change.

Context matters.

Then there’s blinking.

It doesn't need to be dramatically increased, although sometimes it is.

Even a subtle increase can be worth noting.

A cue to pause.
Look around.
Look at your dog.
Check out the situation.

Eyes are a gift.

Both in the sight they give.
And most definitely the insight.

It is and ISN’T the dog.“Yeah, but he reacted TO the dog.”Yes.He absolutely did.But there is a much bigger picture here....
28/05/2026

It is and ISN’T the dog.
“Yeah, but he reacted TO the dog.”

Yes.
He absolutely did.
But there is a much bigger picture here.

“I just want him to stop.
How do I stop the reaction?”

I know you’re trying your hardest.
I know how exhausting this can feel.
And I know sometimes it feels like you’re constantly scanning and waiting for the next reaction.

But sometimes we need to widen the scope.

Trigger stacking is not just seeing three stressful things in a row.
It is the slow and sometimes chronic accumulation of stress.

“He’s only stressed when he sees a dog.”
No.
He really isn’t.

Biology doesn’t work that way.

Think about yourself for a moment.
How do YOU feel after an argument with someone?
That stress can stay with you for hours.
Sometimes days.

Then perhaps the next morning you miss the bus.
You’re late for work.
That night you still relax and you can forget about a good nights sleep, that's not happening.

Stress lingers.

And dogs are no different.

With dogs, people sometimes only look at the last 3 seconds of behaviour while completely missing the previous 12, 24 or even 72 hours.

Poor sleep.
Neighbourhood noise.
Pain or discomfort.
Frustration.
Repeated arousal.

It ALL compounds.

Trigger stacking matters because stress can accumulate.
Dogs don’t always start every situation from the same emotional baseline.

There is no zero on that dial to keep returning to.

Some days their coping ability is already reduced long before the visible reaction happens.

Not every reaction starts in “that” moment.
With “that” dog.

I can. But I’m not going to.I don’t want your dog to shrink away while I insist on ruffling their hair up.They don’t nee...
27/05/2026

I can. But I’m not going to.

I don’t want your dog to shrink away while I insist on ruffling their hair up.
They don’t need me to touch them to prove “I’m safe”.

What they actually need is for me to keep my hands in my pocket and wait for some signals of consent.

We have a tactile “obsession” when it comes to dogs.

Maybe it starts when they’re puppies and their squidginess draws our hands in.
100% their fur and wee fat rolls combined are irresistible.
From there though, it can become a habit.

We see a person up the street we haven’t seen for a while, stop for a chat and our hand goes down to pat while we say “Aww whose this wee girl”.
That’s how easy these habits grow.

They’re ingrained.

How about we start to normalise not touching?
And start normalising watching for consent.

So I ignore?No, but you’re ignoring exactly what you DO want.Excitement gets a lot of attention sometimes.Insistent beha...
26/05/2026

So I ignore?
No, but you’re ignoring exactly what you DO want.

Excitement gets a lot of attention sometimes.
Insistent behaviour gets responses from us.
Barking?
That usually gets an immediate response because it’s louder.

Over time, some dogs start learning “Bigger behaviour works better.”
Because to them, it can.

This is where ignoring comes into it.

Have you been ignoring the best bits your dog shows you?

We focus so much on what we well and truly know we don’t want, and yet when they show us what we want?
We ignore it.
We don’t even notice it.
We don’t mean to but it’s a habit we are now cycling around in.

We’re focused SO much on stopping the behaviour we don’t want, that we let those tiny slivers of stillness, position, or engagement just slip away.

They are THE moments.

We need to open our eyes more.
They will be showing you what you actually want more of.

It may not be in the context we need it to be in yet, but it will be there.

Mark it.

Reward it.

But above all else, don’t ignore those precious wee moments when they DO show you exactly what you want.

26/05/2026

How I make the dog training graphics. A little behind the scenes. Canva

These dogs can “give in” instead of growl.And because of that, there’s no obvious conflict, but there can be discomfort....
24/05/2026

These dogs can “give in” instead of growl.
And because of that, there’s no obvious conflict, but there can be discomfort.
“They’re OK together.”
“Let them work it out.”
“They’ll get used to each other.”

Tolerating something happening is not always the same as feeling safe with it.

Some dogs become very good at avoiding conflict instead of resolving it or escalating.
Some will just simply endure social pressure.

Being aloof can work for them too.

A quieter dog, that doesn’t move too much or isn’t vocal around others has sometimes worked out how to “fly under the radar”
Now there really isn’t anything wrong with that, but we need to be mindful.
Some freeze as a dog approaches.
Some repeatedly roll over and just stay there until the other dog loses interest.

But sometimes they can escalate only after ‘tolerating’ things for too long.

Unfortunately, these quieter dogs are often the ones people can miss completely.
They can also be put into social situations they don’t want to be in at all.

That quietness is mistaken for calmness, acceptance.

Not every struggling dog is loud.

There is no exaggeration here.At the extreme end, these dogs will jump through windows, chew through walls and severely ...
23/05/2026

There is no exaggeration here.

At the extreme end, these dogs will jump through windows, chew through walls and severely injure themselves trying to get back to their person.

And even when it never reaches that physical extreme?
Emotionally, these dogs can still be deeply distressed.

For the families living with this, life can become incredibly small.

People outside the home often don’t understand.

Why you can’t just “go for coffee”.
Why you can’t just go away for a weekend.
They don’t understand why someone always has to rush home.

Life can start revolving around time limits, strict routines and preventing panic before it even begins.

Please hear me when I say this though.
There is hope.
There is ALWAYS hope.

And sometimes it starts with something incredibly small, tiny even, because it has to.

A person standing up.
Taking one step away.
Returning calmly.
Helping your dog learn that distance does not always predict distress.

The timing here matters.
And yes, you will need other people to help you practice this properly.

Hang in there.
Don’t rush this.

Your life doesn’t have to stay this small forever.

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