The Mali Dad

The Mali Dad Welcome to my world of our four rescued Belgian Malinois. Simply a dog training dad sharing ups, downs and everything in between. Shout if you need help 🄰

From basic tricks to real-life problem-solving (some come with a side of ā€œdid that just happen?ā€).

Just an fyi that most of my content / videos etc I pop up on my TikTok - just easier 🤣
10/07/2026

Just an fyi that most of my content / videos etc I pop up on my TikTok - just easier 🤣

183 Followers, 25 Following, 3557 Likes - Watch awesome short videos created by The Mali Dad

27/06/2026
There’s a worrying campaign at the moment from the force-free lobby to punish legitimate dog trainers for using balanced...
12/05/2026

There’s a worrying campaign at the moment from the force-free lobby to punish legitimate dog trainers for using balanced methods with their own and their clients’ dogs. UnleasheUnleashed - Danny Wells Dog Trainingtten a detailed piece on why this faction is a greater threat to the industry than anything it has previously faced. Worth a read.

For the record, I use balanced training methods with my dogs. It works, it isn’t abusive, and it’s fundamentally about education - teaching dogs, particularly high-drive breeds like Malinois, where the boundaries are.

When you meet my dogs and see how well behaved and happy they are, you may start to understand why these lobbyist loons are talking out of their backsides. I’d love to see a force free trainer with my reactive Mali when she faces another dog and see how they cope!

It’s Not Naughty to Punish Your Dog!

Punishment is probably the most misunderstood aspect of modern dog training.

On one side of the fence, there is an increasingly extreme outlook that dogs should never experience anything unpleasant in training. According to this ideology, punishment is automatically labelled abusive, unethical or outdated.

That simply does not stand up to scrutiny.

There is not a species on the planet exempt from punishment-based learning. Human beings are not exempt from it, wild animals are not exempt from it, and dogs are not exempt from it either.

Dogs are predominantly associative learners. They repeat behaviours that lead to desirable outcomes and avoid behaviours that lead to undesirable ones. At its core, learning is about consequences. If a behaviour consistently benefits the dog, the likelihood of that behaviour recurring increases. If a behaviour consistently results in an unpleasant outcome, the likelihood of that behaviour recurring decreases.

That is not opinion. That is behavioural science.

In operant conditioning terms, positive punishment (P+) simply means adding a consequence to reduce the likelihood of a behaviour happening again. It does not mean abuse, intimidation or cruelty. Those are emotional labels people attach to the word because they misunderstand the definition.

A simple human example demonstrates this perfectly.

Imagine you are cooking in the kitchen and accidentally touch a hot pan. Instantly, you retract your hand. The discomfort teaches you something valuable. You learn not to repeat that behaviour.

You do not become traumatised by the experience. You do not spend the rest of your life living in fear of frying pans. The momentary discomfort passes almost immediately, but the lesson remains.

That is punishment-based learning.

This is very similar to what a dog experiences when fair and appropriately applied punishment is used in trainin, be it - not with a frying pan šŸ™„šŸ˜‚. The dog experiences an unpleasant consequence linked directly to a behaviour, and that behaviour becomes less appealing in the future.

The purpose is not suffering. The purpose is clarity.

One of the biggest problems in modern dog training is that people confuse effective punishment with excessive punishment. The two are not the same thing.

An effective punisher is simply something significant enough to reduce behaviour. If the behaviour continues unchanged, then from the dog’s perspective the consequence was not meaningful enough to alter the outcome.

That is another uncomfortable truth many people avoid.

Some trainers pride themselves on using the lowest possible levels of correction imaginable because they want approval from force-free ideology. Meanwhile, the dog continues rehearsing dangerous, obsessive or socially unacceptable behaviours because nothing meaningful has changed from the dog’s point of view.

Repeated ineffective punishment is not virtuous. In many cases, it is simply nagging.

If a dog receives a correction and immediately repeats the behaviour without hesitation, then behaviourally speaking the consequence has not functioned as punishment.

This matters because real life has consequences.

The society we live in functions because humans understand consequences. We look both ways before crossing the road because there are dangers associated with carelessness. We obey laws because there are penalties for breaking them. We avoid harmful situations because experience teaches us what happens when we ignore boundaries.

A healthy respect for consequences is normal. It is part of learning, survival and social structure.

Dogs are no different.

If you want to teach a dog to perform behaviours willingly and enthusiastically, then reward-based training is incredibly important. Reinforcement absolutely should be a major part of any good training programme. Rewarding desirable behaviour creates motivation, engagement and clarity.

But reinforcement alone does not solve every problem.

If a dog is self-rewarding through dangerous or undesirable behaviour, whether that is chasing livestock, attacking other dogs, charging through boundaries, ignoring recall or rehearsing aggression, then rewards may not outweigh the value the dog places on the behaviour itself.

That is where appropriate punishment becomes necessary.

Not emotional punishment.

Not angry punishment.

Not vindictive punishment.

Appropriate punishment.

The goal is not to bully the dog into submission. The goal is to communicate clearly enough that the behaviour loses value and stops recurring.

Unfortunately, public discussion around this subject has become saturated with misinformation. Large animal organisations and ideological movements often promote oversimplified narratives that frame anyone using ethical punishment as abusive. Vast amounts of donation money are funnelled into emotionally driven campaigns and selective interpretations of science designed to support predetermined beliefs.

The reality is far more nuanced.

Good trainers understand both reinforcement and punishment. They understand timing, consistency, thresholds, motivation and behavioural fallout. Most importantly, they understand that dogs are individuals and that training should be based on results, welfare and clarity rather than ideology.

The truth is simple.

If your dog enjoys a behaviour, gains access to reinforcement through that behaviour and sees no meaningful downside to continuing it, the behaviour is likely to persist.

If reward-based methods alone are not changing dangerous or highly rewarding behaviours, then seeking guidance from a reputable trainer who understands how to apply fair and effective punishment may be necessary.

That is not abuse.

That is responsible dog training.

Some awesome shots taken today by IG  - thanks for taking and sending them Donna šŸ˜
10/04/2026

Some awesome shots taken today by IG - thanks for taking and sending them Donna šŸ˜

Bedtime with a Mali in the house šŸ˜‚
31/01/2026

Bedtime with a Mali in the house šŸ˜‚

Watch, follow, and discover more trending content.

I’m often asked what equipment and tools I use, here’s a list with links to the exact kit. I’ve tried a lot with the mal...
17/01/2026

I’m often asked what equipment and tools I use, here’s a list with links to the exact kit. I’ve tried a lot with the malis, they push things hard and I know these all last

Note: I may earn a small commission from these, all proceeds go directly back to our own dogs in way of toys, treats, tools etc

Bit tug toy - these are brilliant, JJ absolutely rags this at full,speed, will try and get a video at some point https://amzn.to/49MkXYl

Large Chuckit ball - storm will kill for one of these over everything else, last forever but they don’t float! https://amzn.to/3ZhmAIn

Halti 3m lead. Very flexible and can be doubled up or left full,length, will warp around your body. We’ve used these for nearly 9 years with our shepskis, just brilliant https://amzn.to/4bAJn9t

The HALTI Control Lead is designed to maximise control when walking your dog. This versatile double clip lead provides multiple functions and optimal control when used with a non pull dog head collar or harness. The Lead Handle aids the training process by allowing your dog to enjoy loose lead co...

Please read, this is so true!
17/01/2026

Please read, this is so true!

I was told today that I shouldn’t be teaching people if I have a reactive dog myself.

That it’s like having a fat personal trainer.
Or a bank account that’s in debt.

And honestly, this belief is everywhere.
But, it’s built on a misunderstanding of what reactivity actually is.

A reactive dog is not a badly trained dog or something that can be trained out of them.

Reactivity is an emotional response, not a lack of obedience.

It describes a dog whose nervous system responds more intensely to certain triggers like other dogs, people, sounds, pressure, because their brain is wired for heightened survival responses.

And, here’s the part that a lot of the dog world still refuses to say out loud:

ā€˜Reactivity’ cannot always be ā€œfixed.ā€

Not because the owner hasn’t tried hard enough.
Not because the trainer isn’t good enough.
But, because reactivity can be shaped by things that cannot be trained out, such as:

• Genetics and temperament
• Early developmental trauma
• Poor or stressful early socialisation
• Chronic pain or medical issues
• Long-term nervous system sensitisation

You cannot obedience-train a nervous system into being something it isn’t.

That all said, it does not mean progress isn’t possible.

It is.

We can lower intensity.
We can shorten recovery time.
We can build coping skills.
We can create safety, predictability, and trust.

A dog may always be ā€˜reactive’ by nature, but they don’t have to be unsafe, distressed, or out of control.

And as for the comparison?

A personal trainer who understands fat loss because they’ve lived it has insight.

A business mentor who’s rebuilt from debt has credibility.

A person with PTSD or anxiety who’s learned coping strategies and boundaries can live a normal life, but the emotions still remain and may surface or change from day to day

And a professional who lives with a reactive dog, managing it ethically, realistically, every single day, understands this work at nervous-system level, not ego level.

Reactivity isn’t failure.
It’s biology meeting environment.

And progress isn’t perfection.
It’s stability, safety, and quality of life.

That’s the truth people don’t like, but it’s the truth dogs and you as dog owners need.

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Llandudno

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