15/04/2026
⚠️ Members of the public are not to approach whilst wearing gloves.
🧤 Serial glove offender. Shows no remorse.
🐾 Approach with caution – highly treat-motivated.
🍖 Will trade stolen goods for snacks.
🚔 Believed to be armed with puppy eyes.
🧤 Claims glove was “found”, not stolen. Investigation ongoing.
📜 Previous convictions: socks, hats, and one slipper (unproven)
🏃♂️ Known to resist arrest unless bribed.
🍗 Bounty negotiable in sausages or chicken.
